Saturday, September 15, 2012

BOOK II - CHAPTER XXII - Christian and Anastasia FanFiction


“Oh, dear God! What do we do? Christian?”

“Shut up and let me focus!” I say firmly to Ros.

“I’m scared!”

“Ros!” I warn her, and the only response I get from her is a light whimpering noise. Her eyes are wide and unfocused; she’s trembling as if she just walked into the Arctic Circle in her underwear. Her lips are moving and no sound is coming out. She is praying.

It’s hard to control the Charlie Tango when the tail is nearly out of commission. The fenestron system in the EC135’s tail is supposed to be a better stabilizer compared to any other helicopter of its class. They use this helicopter for extreme rescue situations all over Europe for God’s sake! This helicopter can hold up to seven passengers and 6400 pounds! Other than Ros and me, it doesn’t have a heavy payload, so that’s a positive in our current predicament.
“Christian! I don’t want to die! I wanna go home to Gwen! Please!” she shrieks losing control. Smoke is coming from the air conditioning system which I promptly turn off to prevent smoke inhalation.

I want to go home to Anastasia, too! I quickly pat my jacket where I have her small gift box. That little box in my pocket is the only lifeline I have, close to my heart, it’s only connection I have to Anastasia. The thought of not holding her, kiss her, love her never again is agonizing, excruciating, soul ripping torturous. What’s worse, some fucker is going to slide in my place and hold and comfort her when I’m gone! Whispering soothing words into her ear, holding her hands to comfort her, hugging her in his embrace.  This is the biggest torture I have ever had to endure!

“NO FUCKING WAY!” I yell, and make Ros jump in her seat. I’m determined more than ever to land this bird. I look at the altimeter amongst the blinking lights and buzzing alarms. It is still very accurate, thank God! I focus all my attention on my instrument panel to assess what is out of commission and what I can do with the remaining tools I have at hand, and try recall all my emergency training.

The two radar altimeter antennas are located underneath the tailbone. It’s used for precision approaches. The fire in the tail is still going, I don’t know what part of tail the fire is on, but I’m assuming it’s on the rotor. One saving grace could be that the blades in the tail are installed irregularly which might help and buy me a few minutes of time. I need to divert my attention. I don’t want to panic! Panicking would be deadly for both of us and I’m the only one who can fly this! How to focus... How to focus.... Focus!


Her answer comes in an incoherent whimper.

“Ros! Ask me a question!”


“Focus! Ask me a damned question!”

“Are you out of your mind?”

“No, not yet! I need to focus, and so do you! Ask me... ask me...” I rack my brain, and a light bulb goes on, “Ask me why the tail blades are irregularly placed in the rotor!”


“Do you wanna go back to Gwen?”


“Then fucking DO IT!” I say making her jump in her place. She looks at me like I lost my marbles. I need to focus! She needs to focus! My brain works better when I’m multitasking! I need to get rid of my panic.

“Mr. Grey, why...” she stops and whimpers, and sniffles. “Why are the blades in the... uhm...”

“The rotor!”

“ the rotor placed irregularly?”

“Good question Ros!” I say, and she gives a tearful ‘what the hell’ smile.

“These German engineers are so fucking smart!” I say as I pull the joystick trying to gain elevation. My voice strained I add, “You see they thought that if you place the blades equally it creates a harmonic vibration or harmonic pitch which is very penetrating,” I say as I try to keep up speed even though the fucking engines have failed, and the Charlie Tango is shaking like it has the flu!

“What they’ve done is after discovering if you break up the distance between the blades, it creates a node - it silences the resonance. That simple noise cancellation trick might be the thing that could save our lives today!” I say in a high pitched rattling voice as the shaking of the helicopter affect my speech.

Hope springs in her eyes. (Uprising by Muse)

“Really, how?” she says sniffling.

“Because, even if I lose any of the blades, remaining blades should still aid me in stabilizing the helicopter until landing. Since the blades are enclosed in the shroud in the tail, if I were to impact and that would eliminate added possibility of getting hurt because of the well forwarded stabilizers and the blades up there,” I say quickly pointing to the ceiling, “are not as long as other helicopters' blades which could eliminate the added interference with the terrain. You know hitting trees and other obstacles as such.” Of course this is hopeful thinking granted that the tail doesn’t break off. I can hear Ros’s harsh breathing over the cans.

I remain silent and try to focus and focus fast.

Okay! I can do this! I can do this! I want to get back to my love! I want to see Anastasia again! (Break the Spell by Daughtry)

The Altimeter shows 174 feet and we are descending quickly and spinning at a slow rate! Fuck! Fuck! I have to use the main fin offset for lateral lift which should create a pull towards the right of the helicopter. I have a fucking tail wind which is not helping, and if I can stabilize the spinning and use that lift I may just have minimal impact!

“Mr. Grey? Christian!” says Ros panicking.

“Ros,” I say swallowing. “Listen, I have to try to create forward flight to use the main fin in order to streamline the aircraft.”

“Oh, ok...” she says as she violently wipes her eyes with the backs of her hands.

“It’s a fairly short aircraft, as helicopters go, where they put a large vertical fin in the back of the tail to create a substantial amount of sideward lift and stabilize the aircraft in flight,” I say to her, and I might as well speak to her in Swedish, because she doesn’t of course understand a word I’m saying, but it keeps her mind occupied, and my mind from veering off to focusing solely on the imminent impact.

“They thought that if they did have a complete catastrophic failure of the fenestron,” she makes an agonizing sound with the word ‘catastrophic,’ “and if I can keep my speed up around 70 knots plus my aircraft should theoretically continue to fly normally without having any losses of control.”

“Really? What’s fenestron?” she asks trying to remain hopeful, and occupy her mind.  

“It’s the tail rotor system.”

“But we were hovering.  Can you get to 70 knots keep the speed, because you said...” she says teary eyes, “ said that both of your fucking engines failed!”

I hold onto the joystick as if our lives depend on it; well it does... I’m supposed to have two auto pilots. If one fails, number two automatically kicks in. Beautiful, but no one fucking thought of the failure of both engines at hovering and slow speeds. So, I have to use my glider skills to get a brick down from 161 feet safely! Unless I can create a forward thrust.

“The fillets on both sides of the aircraft are supposed to aid me stabilize Charlie Tango and help it to fly straight at normal cruise speed which is around 120 to 125 knots.”

“Fucking great, Mr. Grey! But right now your bird seems to have lost its wings!”

I look at the XM Weather Alive to check the wind behind me. I press the button for digital radar; it’ll allow me to see the digital map, so if I can just turn in the right direction, I can use the tail wind for our benefit. My EGPWS stays on all the time which is an the enhanced ground proximity warning system designed to alert pilots if their aircraft is in immediate danger of flying into the ground or an obstacle. It’s a terrain awareness system. Right now I’m looking for a place with minimal impact to land, and I don’t get to choose.
“Yes and no Ros! Each engine drives the transmission and tail rotor. In other helicopters, there is a different setup to drive the tail rotor. The beauty of this helicopter is that even I lose both the engines, the transmission is going to drive the tail rotor through the airflow going through the main rotor!” I say as my teeth are rattling with the shaking of Charlie Tango.

“Fucking hallelujah! Because we get to test all these today! We have lost both engines, and we have a fire going in the tail! Your bird is shaking and rattling like a Los Angeles earthquake! If you can land us despite the problems, I’m personally thanking those fucking engineers who planned ahead!”

I like this better. I can deal with angry. I can’t deal with nervous, jittery, losing control, shrieking when Charlie Tango is about to go down! I have to maintain control of the aircraft and oddly Ros’ anger drives me to focus.

“Well Ros, both engines drives the transmission, the transmission drives the main rotor plus the tail rotor, and one engine will do both jobs, even without both engines the transmission will keep running. In some helicopters, if the engine quits the tail rotor stops spinning. Not in this bird! There is a reason why I paid $4.6 million Dollars for it!” So it becomes crucial for me to land this helicopter soon without crashing to the fucking ground! I have to get it going forward and let the body of the helicopter do the job.

“I really hope they tested those theories boss! If we don’t make it down safely, you overpaid for your fucking chopper! I wanna get back to Gwen! I’m not saying we’re not gonna make it, but just to let you know, you have been the best fucking boss I ever had. You’re a fucking tight ass, but you’re decent. You’re alright boss!” she says sniffing in her raspy voice.

“You really have to quit smoking, Ros!”

“Really? You’re really fucking asking me to quit smoking right now? Because I aim to smoke one whole pack once you land, and I don’t have a single cigarette on me! Don’t you have something nice to say to me since we are going to die?” she asks teary eyes.

“We aren’t going to die!”

“How do you fucking know that?”

“Because, I have a girlfriend I proposed to! I don’t want some other fucker moving in on her, comforting her, holding her hand, and hugging her because I fucking died today! I want to hear her response! I want to hear her say ‘yes’ to me! I don’t want Jose or Ethan end up fucking my girlfriend because I’m not here anymore! I love her! She’s my woman!”

“Wow! You really aren’t gay, boss!”

“Thank fuck! Your gaydar is back in business...” I say as she gives me a teary smile.

She mutters some other shit, but I tune out Ros’ raspy voice in my head. I want to get back to Anastasia! I see her beautiful face, the intensity of her deep blue eyes looking at me in the eyes of my mind and feel her arms holding me. I want to get back to her arms, to her embrace, to her kiss. I don’t want to die here today. I want hear her acceptance of my marriage proposal. I need to... I have to get back to her.

I push the speed up.

“Ros, hold on tight! We are going to go down at about 70 knots of speed. I’m going to try to control the speed at the last few second, but it’s crucial for me to keep speed up since the engines aren’t working until we get very close to the ground, then I’ll cut it!”
Ros just looks bewildered.

“Ros!” I yell firmly, and she jumps in her seat like someone jolting back into their body.

“Yes?” she answers whimpering.

“Look at me! We aren’t going to die! We’re both going home!” I say as I keep the speed up, and look at the terrain with the aid of EGPWS. I have to get as flat to a ground as possible. I see it ahead and turn the helicopter trying to stabilize it using the vertical fin and letting the wind help me push the helicopter in the direction I want to go.

“49 feet, Ros! We’re going to descend quickly.”
(Silver Lake)
I use the horizontal stabilizer and the vertical fin, and let the wind push us with the remaining drive from the transmission. I try to avoid the trees, and locate a place to land with minimal impact. I see it close to the marshes, a patch of land clear of debris, or trees and large rocks. I see the TOT limit reached is flashing on my FLI gauge, the First Limit Indicator, because of the fire in my tail rotor. And the fucking torque is also at the limit flashing on the screen, for fuck’s sake! Of course it’s at the limit, I have no engine power! I’m only running on transmission driving the main and the tail rotor which by the way is on fucking fire like my frigging soul!

“18 feet!” I yell to give heads up to Ros. She braces the sides of her seat.

I cut the speed down and let the rotor take its remaining power to get us down and use the wind to aid the stabilizer to get us in landing in one piece.

“6 feet to impact!”

“Oh please, God!” screams Ros.

“I love you with all my life Ana! I’ll always love you!” I whisper. I can feel the spinning of the main rotor completely stop and we hit the ground like 6.0 earthquake skidding on the grass and Charlie Tango leans on its side to the right, and I hear the blades hitting something and sound of breakage, but the impact of the blade aids the helicopter to lean forward and creates an equal and an opposite force enough to push the helicopter right itself as it finally comes to a stop after the helicopter leans forward one final time and the tail’s weight pulls the nose back up. We rock in our seats jolting back and forth violently several times during the impact. My breath is knocked out of me. I can’t breathe for a minute as if my lungs flattened out like pancakes! I don’t know if I have bruised or broken ribs; my chest is hurting as if an army of Claude Bastilles beat the shit out of me! My neck is bruised because the harness cut into it. A small rise in the ground halting our movement and the tail of the helicopter’s fin is touching the ground as the nose of it is lifted up in the air.  I try to inhale shallow breaths. It hurts to breathe.

“Ros! Are you okay?” I ask once I manage to get a lungful of air. She has a bloody nose, cuts on her arms, shaken, and out of breath, but otherwise alive. Thank God! She looks at me with horrified eyes; her face is matching the color of her hair. Blood is running from her nose and dripping onto her shirt. She wipes it with the back of her hand unceremoniously smudging it all over her face.  

“Oh my God, Christian! I thought we were going to die! I thought...” she says, choking on her words starts sobbing.

I turn off all the electronics to prevent fire spreading the entire helicopter.

“Ros, unbuckle right away. We have to get out!”

I unbuckle the harness quickly, and jump out of Charlie Tango and go to the back of the helicopter and open the clamshell doors on the back of the aircraft. I grab the built in fire extinguisher and quickly put out the fire on the tail rotor. My heart is in my throat! My hands are shaking. The last 8 minutes have been the longest in my entire life. For the last few seconds, I thought I’d never see Anastasia again. I thought I was lost to the world, and not being in the same universe with her was the most excruciating pain I have ever felt...

Ros stumbles out of Charlie Tango and lands in the dirt on the ground. Pencil skirt, and four inches studded Jimmy Choo high heels aren’t meant for outdoors. She walks towards me awkwardly, her heels sinking into the ground. She looks at the smoke from the tail with bewildered eyes, and turns her eyes to the rest of Charlie Tango. Her gaze assessing the broken blade, the small crater Charlie Tango created, its tail touching the ground, and small column of smoke after the fire on the tail has been put out.

“Mr. Grey! You really are one fucking talented pilot!” she says and with that her arms go around me in a hug as I’m standing with the now emptied fire extinguisher in my right hand, standing awkwardly.

I pat her back with one hand, and then rubbing my neck with one hand in contemplation I say, “well, I had dinner plans, if we can get going, I’m sure I can find a way to make it on time.” She lets go of me and looks at me shaking her head.

“I really was very scared. I’ve never been this scared in my entire life, and you with your tight ass ways, however strange, you kept me focused Mr. Grey. Did you know what the most awkward thought I had was as we were getting close to impact?”

“Do tell...”

“Well, I recently read some trivial information about people’s biggest fears. You know how they survey so many people and come up with a number, one of those. Did you know what people’s biggest fear was?”

“Dying?” I ask shuddering.

“No! That’s what I would have thought. It was public speaking! Dying was only the second biggest. I always hated public speaking too. But at the last minute, I decided it was a tie for me.”

I look at Ros with an impassive face. “Well Ros, though standing up before a crowd to make a speech is not my favorite thing to do; I’d rather give your eulogy than be in the box any day.”

Ros looks at me with narrowed eyes trying to give me a scornful face, but then her face breaks into a cathartic laughter and, she says, “Ditto, boss!” making me laugh, too.

“I have a first aid kit here, you might want to clean up the blood off your face,” I say slightly indicating her face with my head. She nods, and I hand her the package, and she cleans up her wounds with the alcohol wipes.

“We need to call for help Mr. Grey,” says Ros after patching herself up.

“We can’t use the radio. The impact knocked most everything out, and a lot of the connections are broken. I can risk another fire turning the power back on; we’re out of fire extinguisher. So, the radio is not an option.”

“I have my cell phone but, we can’t even call 911, there is no cell reception,” she says, making me grimace. No... Fucking... Way! We can’t wait here till someone figures out that we’re lost. We are way out of the road in the back country. By the time they get to figure out we’re lost, and look for us, it could even take a couple of days for them to find us! And I need to get back to Seattle, or fucker Jose will be all over my girlfriend like a static pair of pants!

“Fuck it! I don’t have reception, either!” I say displeased.

“Do we wait? Taylor knows we’re supposed to be on our way back.”

“We can’t wait Ros! Because, they may take a long time to find us, and it will get dark. I’m sure you don’t want to spend the night in the wilderness. Besides, we have no food, and only a liter of water between the two of us. It’ll take time for them to find us. We don’t know what the weather will be like, and if it rains, I don’t want us to risk being in the elements, seeing how Charlie Tango is seated in nearly 45 degree angle.”

“Mr. Grey! You’re Christian Grey! Do you think they’ll take all day and all night to find you? They can dispatch a helicopter to look for us...”

“That’s assuming that they know we are lost. They won’t know that till later in the day, and it will be dark. There is very little chance for anyone finding us in the dark. And we’ll be all over the news tomorrow. I don’t want that kind of publicity. How much charge do you have on your cell phone?”

“It’s about 75%.”

“Mine is nearly 90. We’ll use yours first to guide us to the road with your GPS, and we’ll try to persuade a driver to take us back to Seattle. How much money do you have?”

She digs in her purse, and counts everything. “I have about two hundred and seventy eight Dollars with me.”

I check my wallet and see that I have three hundred and twenty five Dollars. Okay, between the two of us, we have $603 Dollars. That should bribe someone to get us back to Seattle once we find the road.

“Take only your purse and cell phone, we’re walking. If we stay, our phone batteries will drain, and we will have no navigation. Right now at least we can use the GPS in the phone until the batteries run out. Then we may reach a road,” I say.

“Do you have any food Mr. Grey?”

“No,” I say to her my mouth a flat line. What do I look like, 7-Eleven? I’m not open all night! I don’t carry a stash of snacks with me.

She digs in her purse and says, “I have a chocolate bar. Guess we’ll have to share that until we find something.”

“Fine. Let me see your cell phone,” I say, and she hands it to me.

I bring out her GPS, and locate our position on the map.

(Silver Lake map)

“This is where we are,” I say pointing to the map on her cell phone. “Near the southeast side of the lake. We need to get to a highway, so we’ll try to stop a car, hitchhike, whatever it takes and see if they can drive us to Seattle,” I say tracing a route with my finger.

“The closest major road would be Sprit Lake Memorial Highway, so that’s our destination. We’ll find a pathway, and stick to northbound direction to reach Sprit Lake Memorial Highway,” I say. She looks down to her nearly ruined heels, sighs.

“Ok, boss. Lead the way,” she replies.


I would be the first man to admit that I love high heels on a woman; my woman in particular. I think it’s one of the sexiest, most feminine items a woman could keep as a part of her wardrobe. Same for the pencil skirts. There’s something very feminine about them, the way it hugs a woman’s curves, and shapes her body. But, I would rather see Ros in flip flops and a potato sack right now, than those high heels and the pencil skirt. I look at them in distaste. They are slowing us down big time, and I want to get home to Anastasia. Time is ticking, and we’ve been walking for over three hours! The water is gone, Ros is complaining about how her shoes hurt her, and I’m frustrated with the snail speed we’re walking! Her pencil skirt is tight, and I now find them annoying and inconvenient.

“Honestly Ros! I’m ready to take those shoes and dump them into nearest water source! They’re slowing us down. I’m willing to take my shoes off, and let you wear mine. Let’s just walk faster! Since we’re on paved road, I’ll walk in my socks until they rip apart.”

“Mr. Grey! They are $2500 Dollar Jimmy Choos!” What is the deal with women and their shoes, even in dire straits?

“The way they’re slowing us down, I wouldn’t take them for free from Choo himself!”

“I’m surprised no cars are passing through here. Doesn’t anyone live this way?”

“I don’t know. It’s off the beaten path, but we’ll soon get to the highway, though,” I say looking at her shoes and her swollen feet, “it might take a while still. My offer stands about the shoes.”

“Fine! I’ll take you on your offer, but, you can’t toss my babies! I’ll have them all cleaned up, and I hate seeing them all messed up in the dirt and grime, and dust.”

We finally stop; I take my shoes off, and Ros takes her heels off, and wipes off some of the dirt, crooning softly, “my babies, mommy will get you all cleaned up!”

“Fuck Ros! I don’t wanna hear you talking to your shoes like they’re puppies! It’s taking away from your ball crushing persona.”

“Mr. Grey, do you how many balls these babies can crush?” she says rubbing her hands softly over the suede of her shoes. 

“Besides, that’s part of my disguise. If I was just riding on my broom all the time, I’d scare off everyone. Even Miss Frosty wears the best heels. Don’t tell me your little miss doesn’t put a pair of heels on!” she says grinning.

I give her my impassive face with glacial eyes as a response. She holds her hands up in a giving up gesture. I hand my shoes to her, and her feet swim in them.

“Geez, Mr. Grey! What size shoes do you wear?”

“13,” I respond flatly. She grins, shakes her head, but says nothing.
She takes her heels in her hands one in each, her purse hanging on her shoulder. I hold her cell phone guiding us to the highway. I take my jacket off as I’m getting hot and sweaty. Her cell phone is in the red, battery is running out. I quickly memorize the road and the direction we ought to take before her battery runs out. Mine isn’t any better. Still no signal. This is the worst day of my life! Taylor was supposed to go visit his daughter today after dropping me off. His ex told him that his daughter had appendicitis. Bad things come in threes they say. Charlie Tango’s crash, Taylor’s daughter, and I wonder what the third one would be. Jose!

I have a renewed sense of determination. We’re both, sweaty, dusty, dirty, and muddy. The sun is getting down. It’ll be sunset soon. We have to make it to the highway. I just want to make it home to Anastasia, and lose myself in her. I have to see her. I want to feel alive, and there is nothing that makes me feel alive like Anastasia. I want to go home, spread her out and love her till she begs for my cock, push both of us to our limits, and have her hold me till I feel my soul in me!

“Mr. Grey, the highway!” yells Ros brining me out of my daydreams.

“Now what?”

“Now we hail a passing car willing to take us home.”

“Do I have any battery power left on my cell?” she asks.

“No, your cell died over half an hour ago. Mine is blinking red, and no fucking signal. It won’t last a few minutes,” I say bitterly.

“What time is it?”

“6:09. We have better find a vehicle to take us to Seattle. No one would want to take us in the dark. You don’t know what lurks at night, so, people would be weary of strangers on the road.”

“Let’s walk on the side of the road.”

“What direction Mr. Grey?”

“I-5 is that way,” I say pointing the road. So, that’s the direction we want to be in. Someone going in the I-5 direction might be willing to take us. We have $600 bucks. It could tempt someone for a two hour detour.”

We start walking on the side of the highway, and there aren’t many cars passing in our direction, and the two which just passed us without stopping were speeding as if they were being chased by the hellhounds. We walked about a hundred yards down the road, and heard the break squeaks and steam being let out of a big rig. An eighteen wheeler pulled next to us, and the window lowered, a middle aged man with a week’s beard in a John Deere cap stuck his head out the window.
“Howdy strangers. Need a lift someplace?”

Ros and I stop in our tracks. Thank God!

“Yes. We’ve had an accident several miles back, and we’re trying to get back to Seattle. We would be in your debt forever if you could give us a ride. We could pay you for your trouble of course,” I say.

“No trouble at all man. It looks like you walked a long way. And you ain’t got no shoes. Gave ‘em to your little lady, did you? Hop in!”

We open the truck’s cab and I help Ros up into the truck. Handing her the high heels, and her purse, then I climb in.

“Thank you my man! I’m Christian, and this is Ros.”

“Name is Len. Len Mattson of South Dakota. You guys look parched. Are you thirsty?”

“Yes!” Ros jumps in. “Do you have any snacks or something. We haven’t had anything to eat all day since breakfast. We can pay you for the food.”

“No need for that little lady. Let me pull aside at a pullout to be safe, and we’ll eat dinner. I have some sandwich meat and some trimmings. We can make turkey or roast beef sandwich. I’ll share it with you. Gotta watch my girlish figure, you know,” he says joking and patting his large belly which looks like he should have given birth to a ten pound baby last month.

At a pullout on the side of the road, Len the trucker stops.

“I had installed an additional storage box below. I have a cooler there. What’s your pleasure, I have water and Pepsi? I’ll make the sandwiches, you take what you like.”

“I’ll take water, and a Pepsi if you have an extra, I sure need the caffeine,” says Ros.

“I’ll just take water, Len,” I say.

Len goes down and he walks surprisingly agile from behind despite his sizeable gut. Ten minutes later he’s back with sandwiches, and drinks for us.

“I don’t pre-make the sandwiches. The bread gets soggy. I just make ‘em before I eat ‘em,” he says.

I look at Ros, and she nods.

“Len, since, you’ll be taking us to Seattle, and you’re sharing your lunch with us, please allow us to pay you.”

“Son, put away your money. It ain’t no good here. Besides, my little lady, Evelyn is her name, would have my hide for not showing kindness to strangers. We don’t do that in Mitchell.”

“Trust me, I can afford it,” I say.

“Well, good for you son. I can afford this kindness. Humanity ain’t dead, not in Mitchell, South Dakota,” he says grinning, and takes a swig of his Pepsi.

“Thank you,” I say completely awed at the kindness of this stranger.

“Len, do you happen to have a cell phone?”

“No, young man,” he says chuckling. “You’re going to find it strange, but, I never got one of those. I’m trying to trim the fat from all expenses for my boy,” he says with a gleam in his eyes with the mention of his son.

“Oh, too bad. Our cell phone batteries are dead, and my girlfriend would be worried about me. I haven’t called her.”

“You two ain’t together?” he asks curiously.

“No!” we both say in unison.

“She works for me,” I say, and Ros adds, “I have a girlfriend, too.”

Len nearly chokes on his sandwich.

“You’re what Reverend Walsh said you are, like Ruth and Naomi!”

“I’ve never been accused of anything in that way, but, who are Ruth and Naomi?”

“To tell you the truth, I wasn’t paying much attention when he was talking about it. I was tallying up the bills in my head, but don’t tell that to Evelyn, she’s a Godly woman, she is.”

“I promise, I won’t say a word,” says Ros.

“I ain’t judging you, understand. I’m a sinner myself, we all are. I just don’t understand those feelings you speak of. But, ma’am, men have so much more to offer. You know what I mean?” he says with genuine curiosity.

“Well, I've learned that in the third grade when Jimmy Simpson was running for the class president. His motto was 'vote for me and I'll show you my pee pee'. I voted for him out of curiosity. But, I’m not interested in what they have to offer. Never have.”

“You don’t say! Curious, just curious. Let me ask you this ma’am. This here Christian is good looking young man. You see nothing in him? Not even a tiny spark?” he asks leaning in; he looks like he's trying to solve a difficult math problem.

“Not a thing. No offense Christian,” she says turning to me. “Though I know plenty of women drool over him. And besides he has a girlfriend he loves,” she says taking a large bite of her turkey sandwich. “Are Ruth and Naomi local lesbians?” she asks curiously. Len chuckles at her question.

“No ma’am, they’re in the Bible.”

“Bible has lesbians in them?”

“I ain’t saying it does, or it doesn’t. I’m not a very educated man. I’m only repeating what the reverend said. It could be much ado about nothin’. You see, and I have to admit I wasn’t listening all that well, he can get boring, you know. Well he said that Ruth was the daughter in law of Naomi. She had another daughter in law, Orpah, that’s where Oprah gets her name from, you know the lady my wife watches a lot on Tee Vee,” he says emphasizing.

“Anyway...” he says and I interrupt.

“Len, is it possible to drive, and tell the story? I really have to get going.”

“Oh, yeah, yeah!” he says and turns the truck on, pulling into the highway.

“Here’s the thing,” he says as if I never interrupted. “Something happens and the husbands die, Ruth’s and Orpah’s, I mean. Ruth remains with her mother in law, and the reverend said Ruth clung to Naomi.”

“You mean she stayed with her?”

“Yeah, but the way Reverend said it was some Hebrew word, apparently used the same way as Adam clung to Eve in Genesis.”

“What word was that?”

“Little lady, I barely speak my own language good enough, now you’re asking me a word in Hebrew. But as it happens, I remember it, because it kinda sounded like Dubuque, Iowa, where I have my cousin Mark where he owns a grocery store. Nice place. Anyway, the word was ‘dabaq’, because it sounded like Dubuque, I asked reverend if it was spelled that way, and he spelled out for the whole congregation, which was really nice of him. But after the sermon, Mrs. Shubert whispered to my little lady Evelyn that the reverend preached that sermon, because he found out his favorite niece Margie who would never date a boy, not even the quarterback of the football team was secretly admiring Reese Jacobsen!”

“Who’s she?” asked Ros.

“A gal from her high school class. But Reese married Jonny Griffith, and has two beautiful boys. She ain’t that way.”

“It’s a small town, maybe the Reverend’s niece didn’t find what she was looking for there.”

“I reckon so, ma’am. But anyway, that’s the rumor. To this day, I never knew why the Reverend gave that sermon. But he just let it at that, and let it simmer and said, that it was curious the word ‘cleave’ was right there in that context, and raised his bushy eyebrows, and being Irish, you wouldn’t think he would have those kind of bushy eyebrows, but he did nonetheless, and I never forgot that sermon. So, there you have it.”

“So are Ruth and Naomi lesbians?”

“That’s the curious thing. Naomi married her off to Boaz, a distant male relative or other. In them days, if you were a widow, life was hard ma’am. So, you had to have a husband.”

“Maybe they were just close friends. Sometimes, friends are closer than relatives.”

“Maybe you’re right ma’am. We have no way of asking them anyhow. They’re long gone. Maybe they were just too loyal to each other.”

“It’s probably wishful thinking on your Reverend’s behalf.”

“No matter what it was, I ain’t gonna judge you ma’am. That’s God’s place, and I ain’t playing God. And besides, I have a disabled son my little lady is taking care of at home. Who knows what I’d done and God is punishing me for it...” he say sorrowfully.

I narrow my eyes.

“Why would you think that God’s punishing you with a disabled child?”

“Oh, no! He ain’t a disappointment. He’s the sweetest boy you can hope to have. He’s fifteen now, but a father wishes his son to play football in the team, and I’d like to take him on a trip with me. But, he has these seizures and the doctors never did figgir out why he has ‘em. Evelyn, my little lady and I took him to doctor to doctor, and he ain’t getting better. I mortgaged this rig to get him taken care of, but, money’s gone and no results,” he says worried.

“How do you figure this is a punishment?”

“Son, look at me! I’m 55 years old. That’s the kid we tried to have for years and finally had, and he had these problems. And now, I caint fix him. I must have done something wrong when I was younger because I’m a disappointment of a father. You want to be able to provide for your family and fix their ailments, and I ain’t able to do that. That kid deserves a better father than me,” he says shaking his head.

“What’s his name?” I find myself asking.

“Trevor,” he says proudly. “Sweetest young man you’ll ever meet, present company excepted. Evelyn home schools him, because we don’t want him to be teased at school if he has one of his episodes. Kids can be cruel, and you know how it is for teenagers,” he says.

I knew all too well how it was to be different.

“I think your kid is lucky to have the best father there is for him,” I say to Len as Ros looks at me curiously.

“That’s kind of you to say it young man. Say, what kind of accident did you have anyway? Where is your car?”

“We didn’t have a car crash. We had a helicopter crash,” I say as a matter of factly.

“You don’t say! Well, then God really must love you young man,” he says to me, and turns to Ros, and adding, “...and you, young lady to spare you to those who love you!”

“Yes, we are very lucky,” adds Ros in a small voice.

From the distance, I could see the familiar silhouette of the city of Seattle in the distance, and my heart lurches with excitement to see Anastasia again.

“Well, we’re getting close to home, kids,” says Len with excitement as the truck moves on the highway shaking his oversize belly.

“We’ll drop you home first young lady. Looking at the size of those heels, you might wanna soak your feet in some Epsom salt. I don’t know how you city girls walk in them shoes. I’d trip and break my back!” he says chuckling.

“Well Len, then I’m glad they fall onto my lot than yours,” she laughs back happy with the prospect of getting home.

“Our homes are very close to each other actually, Len,” I say. “You’ll need to go to downtown Seattle. Mine is a big building called Escala, you can’t miss it. Ros is almost across the street from me.”

“Stone throw away, huh?”

I laugh at his assessment. “You can say that.”

“You gotta direct me to the building you want me to go young lady,” Len says to Ros.

As we approach Ros’ building, I could see some photographers waiting around at her building. Ros and I getting lost wasn’t a secret apparently. News leaked. I look at Ros.

“You might wanna call Andrea for me, and have her contact PR and make a statement saying we’re fine, and nothing to worry. And if it leaked, she might have to contact my parents. They might want to find out,” I say.

“Might? Son, you’re not a father I gather, but any parent would want to know that their kid is okay especially if they had an accident. They must be worried sick! Let your mom and dad know you’re okay,” he says.

“I’ll do that,” I say giving a small smile for his benefit.

“We really appreciate for all your help Len! Look, we have 600 bucks between the two of us now. Are you sure you don’t want it? You took a detour, and shared your food with us. And you could use the money for your kid.”

“That’s kind of you son, but, Evelyn would have my hide if I got paid for a kind deed. If you ever get back to our neck of the woods, Mitchell, South Dakota, look me up, Len Mattson, or if I’m on the road, my Evelyn would love to have you guys over.”

“Thank you. We are in your debt,” I say to him solemnly and quite surprised at the kindness of a stranger.

Ros points to her building, and we drop her off.

I point Len to my building, and he pulls the truck in front of Escala. He’s surprised with the small army of photographers outside as I was.

“News of you getting lost is out then, son,” he says extending his hand. “You must be an important man of your own right.”

“Thank you Len. I won’t forget your kindness.”

“Ohh, think nothing of it,” he says shyly. “Call your mama, now. See you around son,” he says, and I shake his hand. I get down in my bare feet, my socks, my shoes Ros handed to me before she got off, and my jacket in my hand.

I wave to Len as he drives off smiling.

“Mr. Grey! Mr. Grey! John Brattell from Seattle Times. Do you have a statement for us, sir?”

“Mr. Grey, is it true that your helicopter went down?”

“Mr. Grey, are there any casualties with your accident sir?”

“Mr. Grey! Mr. Grey! The news of your helicopter getting lost is all over the place. How did you get rescued, and how did you get home?”

“My office will make an official statement. Good night gentlemen,” I say as Steve the doorman opens the door allowing me in, and closing it right after.

“Good evening sir. I’m glad you’ve made home,” he says nodding his head.

“Me, too,” I say smiling oddly.

I hit the call button on the elevators in the lobby. It feels like forever for the elevator to reach down to the lobby and open up. I’m nervous that Jose and Anastasia are alone in the apartment. I hate the idea of another man alone with her. I am writhing in jealousy right now. But I have missed her beyond belief. Did she know I was missing? Did she worry about me? I just want to hold my girl, and ... I couldn’t even bring the rest of the thought. The elevator dings open, and I walk in holding my socks, shoes and jacket in my hands. I punch in the code, and the elevator door closes. The seconds couldn’t past fast enough for me to reach her. My heart lurches to my throat. I could have and died today, and left her behind. This has awakened something in me. I want reaffirmation of life, I want to kiss, and love and feel her. In fact, I want to fuck the hell out of her tonight. Hell, I want to love her, be carnal, be primal, be in her, on her, around her... Just be with her. I need her like I need my next breath!

As the elevator reaches up to my penthouse, and doors dings open, I am taken aback with the large gathered crowd inside my apartment. What are they all doing here?

I hear my mother shriek like her heart is being ripped off with my name on her lips:

“Christian!” like she’s calling to her lost child. The next thing I see is my mother running not towards me, but at me ungracefully and just slamming into my body like a strongside linebacker on Superbowl Sunday as if she’s ready to tackle the running back! I only have enough time to I drop my shoes, socks, and my jacket to the floor to catch my mother and steady myself. She throws her arms around my neck and kisses my cheeks over and over again like I came back from dead. And oddly, I feel no apprehension for her holding me like this as she has never done this or shown me this sort of emotion.
“Mom? You okay?” I ask bewildered gazing down at her. She’s always so controlled, and so sure of her words and her emotions. I have never, ever seen her lose control like this and her emotions never came flooding like that, except perhaps when I went into fights at school, and when I dropped out of college, but even then, it had never been with this intensity, and never had I seen an outpouring of love like this, it floors me.

“Son, I thought I would never see your beautiful face again,” she says in a choking whisper, resurfacing my fears.

“I’m here now, mom,” I say in a strained voice trying to comfort her, I stroke her back absently.

“Honey, I died a thousand deaths today, worrying, crying,” she says sniffling in a hushed whisper. Then my mother, Doctor Grace Trevelyan-Grey starts sobbing and gasping unabashedly. What? Wow! Oh! My mom is crying for me! For me! Why? I look at my mother who now looks like a child lost her favorite toy, and I feel compelled to comfort her, and hold her into my embrace.

“Christian, oh baby, I’m...” she says sobbing, and holding me tighter and crying on my neck without any restraint, and with complete relief. I can’t say anything in response but to hold her tighter and rock her in a soothing manner to comfort her. It must have been my mother’s cries that alert my father who rushes out of Taylor’s office into the living room, and he comes barreling down towards both of us.

“Oh, dear God! He’s alive! Shit! You’re home!” and with that he’s holding my mother and I both into a bear hug, unshed tears pooled in his eyes, and he tries to hold them back, in his relief.

Unable to comprehend his response, all I can say is, “Dad?” questioning his mood. Why? He squeezes us hard, and absently rubs my back, and I somehow don’t flinch from his touch. Mia comes running in long strides and barrels into us all and joins into our group hug. Finally my father unable to contain his tears in his eyes, pulls back, sniffles, tries to compose himself and wipes his eyes away with the back of his hands like a child, and finally claps me on my shoulder unable to utter a word without choking. Mia, and finally my mother leave the embrace slowly, and my mother regaining some of her composure manages to mutter a, “sorry son.”

 “No, mom, it’s alright,” I say bewildered with her emotional outburst.

“Where have you been Christian? What’s happened to you son?” she weeps, her head in her hands unable to contain her grief once again.

I blink several times unused to seeing her in such a sorrow. All this is over me?

“Oh, mom,” is all I can say, and I pull her into my arms again, kissing her hair. “I’m alright mom, I’m here now. It’s just taken me hell of a time to get back from Portland. What’s going on with this welcoming committee?” I say and I look around the crowd. My eyes seek one person, and one particular person alone. I finally find her. My eyes lock with her, the sight I longed to see all day; the sight that have been my lifeline. And her hand is held and comforted by none other than fucking Jose’s! My eyes are fixed on his hands encasing my girl’s. I blink up at him territorially, and instinctively he lets go of her hands. My mouth still goes into a tight line. I have dreaded seeing this all day, that someone else might be comforting her in my absence. And here’s that someone else. Anastasia’s eyes are red, and swollen, her lips are pink, swollen with her cries.

But, I’m still confused with all these people at my home. What’s going on?

“I’m alright mom. What’s wrong?” I ask her, and she holds my face in both her hands like she does a small child’s.

“You’ve been missing all day son! We’ve learned that...” she stops, trying to collect herself. “We’ve learned that your flight plan, well, your flight never made it to Seattle. Why didn’t you contact us? Any of us?” she says distraught.

“I’m sorry mom. I never thought it’d take this long to get back,” I reply.

“Fine, but, didn’t you think of calling us at all?”

“There was no battery power left in my cell.”

“Christ, son, you should have stopped somewhere, and called collect, why didn’t you?”

“It’s a very long story mom. Didn’t get a chance,” I respond.

“Christian Grey! Don’t you ever do that to me again! Do you understand me? Ever!” she scolds me half shouting, with sorrow and relief ridden eyes.

“Okay, mom. I won’t,” I say wiping her running tears away, and give her another hug. When I let go of my mother, Mia comes to hug me but not before she lands a hard slap on my chest.

“You jerk! Do you know how much you worried us?” she shouts in tears, and hugs me again.

“I’m sorry. I’m home now, for God’s sake,” I mutter. Once I release Mia, my brother Elliot comes forward. My dad holds Mia under one arm and he wraps his other arm around my mother. My brother, my macho brother comes and hugs me to my complete surprise, and he lands a hard slap on my back with his hands.

“It’s so great to see you bro!” he says gruffly trying to conceal his emotions, but unable to.

Anastasia is frozen in her place, and Katherine whispers something to her. I just can’t take my eyes off her.

“Mom, dad,” I say my gaze fixed on Anastasia, “I’m going to go and say hello to my girl now,” and they step away nodding and smile.

My eyes fixed on hers, I move in slow but determined steps, still unable to believe that I am seeing her again. She rises up from her seat, and falters, and finally bolts into my open arms.

“Christian! Christian! Christian!” she sobs in my arms. Relief finally floods me to have her back in my arms, and her scent, her presence, her voice awakens all my senses. I bury my face in her hair, inhaling her, devouring her scent, and feeling life in me once again.

“Hush baby, I’m here now,” I whisper, and just hold her. She finally manages to hold her face up to look up at me, and I kiss her.

“Hi baby,” I whisper into her mouth.

“Hi,” she murmurs back with a choked back sob.

All I feel is overwhelming love for her right now, and I don’t want to let her go.

“Did you miss me?” I ask.

“A little,” she says making me grin.

“I can tell, you did,” I say, and reaching up to her face with one hand, I gently wipe her tears away, and they course down relentlessly from her cheeks.

Her face cringes into a sorrowful expression, and I she begins choking on her sobs again. “I really thought...” she says breaking down, “I thought...” and unable to word her thoughts, I hold her tight, and comfort her.

“I know baby. I can see that. I’m here now. I’m so sorry. Hush now darling. I’ll explain later,” I murmur to her lips comforting her, and I kiss her once again, tasting the saltiness of her tears and sorrow. I’ve missed her so much; I don’t want to let her go.

“Are you alright?” she asks, releasing me from her embrace all too soon, and touches my arms, my chest, my waist to feel my presence, feel me well in her touch, and I feel no apprehension to her touch. I craved it all day, I desired it, and I would have lost it forever. I stand firm in my place, and look at her unblinking, feeling her touch, reveling in it. I’m hers, and she’s mine. Thank God! I’m back with her, here at home.

“I’m okay baby. I’m not going anywhere,” I state firmly.

“Oh, thank God, Christian!” she says holding me in a tight embrace again. “Are you hungry, thirsty? Do you want anything?” she asks in a single breath.

“Yes, I am,” I reply, and she tries to turn and get something for me to eat, but I firmly tug her back into my embrace, and finally rest her under my arm. I extend a hand to her ‘friend’ Jose.

“Mr. Grey,” he says in an even tone.

I make a snorting sound even I don’t recognize. After the flood of emotions I’ve been showered in the last few minutes, my heart softens a smidgen. “Call me Christian, please,” I say.

“Christian,” he says nodding. “Welcome back. Glad you’re okay man... and uhm, thank you for letting me stay and crash at your place,” he says appreciatively.  

“No problem,” I say, thought it wasn’t my first choice, but now all is well in my universe, I can handle it. All of a sudden Mrs. Jones appears on my side, and she looks distressed, her hair is out of her usual bun, and she’s wearing gray leggings and a large gray sweatshirt with WSU Cougars printed on it. She looks like a college student than my all in control housekeeper.

She too has been crying, and as she wipes her eyes with a Kleenex, she tries to gain her composure and asks, “Can I get you anything Mr. Grey?”

Mrs. Jones has always been a loyal employee, but I had never in a million years assumed that she would be this worried about me. I can only give her a fond smile, and say, “Can I get a Budvar please Gale, and maybe a bite to eat.”

Anastasia jumps up to get me the food and the beer.

“No,” I pull her down. I can’t bear her absence from my side. I have craved it the last eight hours. It’s been a torture for me. “Don’t go,” I say softly and my embrace confines her next to me.

Reassured, she looks up and says, “Okay,” softly.

“Dude, I’m surprised that you don’t want something harder! What the fuck had happened to you? Dad called me first and said the chopper was missing, and,” but my mom cuts him off scolding him.


“Helicopter, not chopper,” I growl, and Elliot grins at the semantics. Elliot knows that I find chopper a horrible nickname for a helicopter. Most aviation professionals cringe with the name. Helicopters are also known as rotary wing aircraft, because the wings or blades of the helicopters spin. Only the non-flying laymen call them choppers. It’d be like calling an airplane “a bird.” Elliot grins like he hit a home run with his ongoing joke.

“I’ll tell you what happened, let’s just all sit,” I say, and pull Anastasia with me over to the sofa. My entire family, Jose and Katherine sit down, and everyone fix their eyes on me, waiting anxiously to find out. I take a long draft from the beer and set it back down to the coffee table. When I hold my head up, I notice Taylor entering into the room anxiously. Mrs. Jones must have informed him of my arrival. He looks worried, upset, and relieved all at the same time. I nod at him in acknowledgement, and he nods back.

“How’s your daughter?”

“She’s okay now, sir. It was a false alarm.”

“That’s good,” I say finally hearing another good news.

“I’m glad you’re back, sir. Will that be all?”

“We need to collect Charlie Tango,” I reply.

“Now or in the morning sir?”

“I think morning is better, Taylor,” I say thinking it’ll be hard to locate it right now, and I don’t want to go anywhere to show the way. I need to remain next to Anastasia.

“Alright, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you sir?” he asks, and I finally shake my head, and he gives me a genuine Jason Taylor smile as rare as a live unicorn, and leaves to his office.

My dad’s insistent voice pulls me back into the room.

"Christian, what’s happened son?” he asks.

“Well, I had a call this morning from the WSU in Vancouver to resolve a funding issue. So, I took Ros with me to sign her up as an executive of the funds; that way if there has been any other problems, she could deal with it on my behalf without me having to travel,” I say as let Anastasia hold my hand and caress my knuckles. It feels great to have this physical connection. It’s been something I’ve been longing, keeping my head straight through the whole ordeal, keeping me focused, and determined.

“Having resolved the funding issue, Ros asked me if I could take a small detour and show her Mount St. Helens. So, on the way back I took the detour, because I knew the Temporary Flight Restriction was lifted, and I wanted to see how the mountain now looked. Guess it was fortunate that we did, because we were flying quite low, in fact around two hundred feet Above the Ground Level, and right when I was flying in the vicinity of Silver lake, my instrument panel lit up like a Christmas tree, and the alarms were buzzing. It showed that I had a fire in the tail rotor system, and I had to make quick decisions to land the helicopter. Part of the electronics already went out due to the fire, and I had to minimize the remainder of electronic usage, and radio was already out of commission, and as I reached closed to the ground, I had to shut everything off, and land,” I say leaving off the entire ordeal we had to go through.

They’re all too worried, and I don’t need to worry them further with details.

“Of course, I wasn’t going to risk turning them back on again because of the risk of fire another fire like the one we had during flight. The cell phones had no reception obviously, because we were nowhere near any cell tower. But the GPS was working on the Blackberry, and that helped us navigate to the nearest road. It took us about four hours to get out to the road because Ros was in heels until then,” I say remembering her very high heels and pencil skirt which put us into snail pace.

“Neither of us had any cell reception, Ros’s battery died first, and mine dried up on the way.” I feel Anastasia’s body tense up with my statement, and I pull her onto my lap for comfort. I need the closeness myself, I need to feel her.

“But, how then were you able to get back to Seattle?” my mother asks who is also curiously and perhaps pleasantly eyeing Anastasia and I practically cuddling in front of the family.

“Ros and I pooled our resources. We had about six hundred dollars between the two of us and were going to bribe someone to drive us back to Seattle. But a truck driver stopped and, and agreed to bring us home. We offered him the money, but he refused and shared his food with us,” I say remembering Len Mattson’s kindness. I make a mental note to repay him in kind.

“Trucks drive slower than cars, and it took us forever. He didn’t have a cell phone. Weird, but true. I just didn’t realize...” I say unable to word the overwhelming love my family has shown me.

“What? That we would worry about you? Oh, Christian! We have been going out of our minds in your absence!” scolds my mother.

“You were all over the news, bro!” says Elliot.

“Well, I figured that much when I saw the small army of photographers and reporters outside. I’m so sorry mom, I should have asked the driver to stop and call you guys. But, I was too anxious to be back,” I say and my glance automatically shifts to Jose. I didn’t want him all over my girlfriend.

My mother shakes her head as if she’s trying to shake her worries away, and adds, “You don’t know how glad I am that you’re back in one piece, darling.”

Anastasia puts her head on my chest inhaling me, trying to feel my presence, holding me tighter. I feel her tear drops falling onto my chest, and her silent cries aches my heart.

“You say that both engines failed?” my father asks in disbelief.

Too much of a coincidence. I shrug and absently run my hand down her back, feeling Anastasia’s presence and drawing comfort from her. “Well, yeah, go figure.”

Anastasia gives a small sob, and tries to maintain her composure.

“Shhh...” I soothe her putting my finger under her chin and make her look up at me. “Stop with the crying baby,” I say softly.

She wipes her eyes and her nose with the back of her hands, “stop with your disappearing,” she sniffs her lips quivering. Her love and affection makes me smile.

“Electrical failure, huh? That’s odd...The circumstances, don’t you think so son?” I know it is.

“Yes, it is, dad. It crossed my mind, but right now, I don’t want to think about it. I just want to go to bed, and think about all that shit tomorrow.”

“What about the media? Have they been informed that you have been found and well?” asks Katherine.

“Yes. My assistant Andrea and my PR people will deal with the media. Ros was going to call her after we dropped her home.”

“She did. Andrea called me to let me know you were alive and well,” says my father. I realize that I have good employees who rise up to the challenges.

“I have to give that woman a raise. It’s quite late, and she’s working,” I say.

“Well, this is our cue ladies and gentlemen. My dear brother needs his beauty sleep,” says Elliot wiggling his eyebrows. I grimace at him.

“Cary, since my son is safely at home, you can take me home, dear,” says my mother in a gentle, adoring tone.

“Yes darling. I think we could all use some sleep,” says my father.

“Stay, please,” I offer them.

“No, honey, I want to get home. Now that I know you’re safe, I can breathe easy,” she says lovingly. Unwilling, I move Anastasia to the sofa so I can hug my mother goodbye. She holds me tight, puts her head on my chest inhaling, feeling my presence, and shows me her outpouring of love. I feel completely content.

“You have no idea how worried I was darling,” she whispers.

I blink, and hold her tights. “I’m fine, mom.”

She leans back while I’m holding her, and finally feeling secure that I’m really here, and that she’s in my arms, she nods, “Yes, I believe you are, son,” she says, and I think she feels happy that I have someone to hold and love me at home as she looks at Anastasia. Anastasia blushes profusely.

As we walk mom and dad to the foyer, my sister Mia calls after them.

“Mom, dad, I’m coming, wait for me!” She sounds petulant.

Katherine Kavanagh hugs Anastasia on her way out and whispers back and forth with Anastasia. Elliot calls his girlfriend from the elevator. “Come on, baby, let’s go,” he coaxes her.

“We’ll talk tomorrow Ana, I know you’re exhausted,” she says to Anastasia.

“Of course. I’m sure you’re exhausted as well. You’ve traveled a long way today.”

They hug once more, and Ethan shakes my hand and he hugs Anastasia to my distaste. Jose is waiting by the foyer. “Look guys, I’ll turn in and leave you guys to yourselves,” he says. Anastasia blushes to his remark.

“Do you know where you’re staying?” I ask him, he nods in answer.

“Yeah, your housekeeper...” he says, but Anastasia interrupts him.

“Her name is Mrs. Jones.”

“Sorry, Mrs. Jones showed me the room earlier. You have quite a place here Christian,” he says.

“Thank you, Jose,” I say, and hug Anastasia’s shoulders and lean in and kiss her hair.

“I’m famished. I’ll go and eat whatever Mrs. Jones fixed for me. Goodnight, Jose,” I say, leaving Anastasia and Jose standing in the foyer. I want to show Anastasia I trust her, though it’s hard to do when I know so well the guy is head over heels over my girlfriend.

I come to the breakfast table, and without even paying attention to what I’m eating, I devour the contents of my plate. All I want to do tonight is to lose myself in my girlfriend. When Anastasia walks back into the room, I have an immense yearning in my heart, a feeling that I can’t live without her, that she’s my reason for living. We just gaze at each other without words for a while, drinking each other in.

“He’s still got it bad for you,” I murmur.

She gives me a small smile, and asks, “and how would you know that Mr. Grey?”

“I am a sufferer of the same affliction Miss Steele. I recognize the symptoms,” I reply. It’s called being in love.

“I thought I’d never see you again Christian,” she says in a whisper, completely sorrowful. All of a sudden I want to comfort her, and keep worry away from her. “It wasn’t as bad as it sounds,” I find myself saying. She picks my jacket, shoes and socks from the floor and move towards me.

I reach to my jacket, and say, “I’ll take that baby.” Finally, we are alone. I’m with Anastasia who has been my lifeline throughout the whole ordeal. She gave me hope, she gave me life, she gave me fight, she gave me reason to want to come back home tonight. I can’t bear the mere inches between us, and close the remaining distance and I hold her into my embrace.

“Oh, Christian!” she says gasping and sobbing. Her tears roll in a heavy downpour onto my chest.

“Hush baby,” I soothe her, kissing her hair. “Did you know that in the few seconds of pure terror before landing, all my thoughts were of you? You kept me tied to life, you’re my talisman, you’re my angel, Ana,” I say. There it is. All my fears exorcised before her.

She sobs some more into my chest holding me tighter. “I really thought I lost you Christian,” she says in an agonizing tone. As she holds me tighter, she drops my shoes she’s holding to the floor, and we just stand there in the bubble of our embrace. Nothing exists in the world, but our connection right now.

“Come and shower with me,” I murmur pulling her hand. I need to feel her. All of her! I need to have a life affirming experience, and only she can give it to me!

“Okay,” she replies looking up at me, her face flushed and stained with tears, her eyes are red from crying. I reach down to her, and lift her chin up with my fingers.

“Ana Steele, even tear stained, you’re the most beautiful woman,” I say and lean down and kiss her. “And your lips are soft,” and kiss her again, deepening the kiss, and she gives into the kiss, and merges herself with me.

“I need to put my jacket down,” I murmur against her lips.

“Just drop it,” she whispers into my mouth.

“I can’t baby,” I say remembering her small gift that was my sole tie with her, my only connection that kept me alert. Anastasia leans back puzzled.

“I take the small box she gave me, and show it to her, “This is the reason,” I say. I’m hoping she’d let me open it. It’s 12:03. Technically it’s Saturday.

“Open it, now,” she whispers.
“Thank God! I was hoping you’d say that. This little box has been driving me insane,” I say, and she grins in response.

My heart is thumping, now that I’m going to be able to see what secret this box is holding. I untie the string, and unwrap the little brown wrapper. It houses a small rectangular plastic keychain. I hold it up in my hand, confused with the meaning of it. It has a picture of the Seattle skyline like an LED screen. It’s focused on the Space Needle, and the word SEATTLE is written large letters flashing on and off.

What does that mean?

Key to the house? Key to my heart? Key to her heart? That she’ll move in?

What is it? I look at the keychain, and then I look at her completely addled, questioning.

“Just turn it over, Christian,” she whispers, breathless.

When I turn it over, my heart lurches and stops, and my eyes go wide. I have never been this happy in my entire life! Nothing I ever received made me as happy as this tiny inexpensive, but now priceless keychain, holding the key to my happiness. My lips part in disbelief because I have no words.

The word, yes, flashes on the back of the key chain.

“Happy birthday, Christian,” she whisper. And it fucking is! (Start of Something Good by Daughtry)



luiza claudina said...

parabens pelo o trabalho seu,é maravilhoso e viciante..nao consigo viver sem ele mais ..muito bom mesmo parabens..

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Obrigado Luiza! Eu faço o meu melhor.

Martha Baltazar said...

OMG Emine. This was fantastic. I was sobbing like a baby. I loved, loved, loved it. Your writing is so awesome. Each week I look forward to another chapter and you never disappoint. Thank you so much. Laters, baby.

Cynthia Settimo said...

AWESOME Chapter! a nice surprise to see being that I wasn't expecting it until Monday. Cannot wait for the next one. :)

Donna Raively said...

Always great, I love it and what a nice surprise for a Saturday. Beautiful little girl and happy birthday Rayah!

Ana N. said...

Wow, I was not expecting this until Monday, this was pleasant surprise. The chapter made me feel as if I were in the helicopter with Christian and Ros. Thank You for this greatly appreciate it.

A.N.A said...

Wow, I was not expecting this until Monday, this was pleasant surprise. The chapter made me feel as if I were in the helicopter with Christian and Ros. Thank You for this greatly appreciate it.

jackie young said...

That was awesome Emine and a very nice surprise, i loved it ,i would like to thank you for putting it on early as i know that you are very busy and i hope your daughter had a lovely birthday.
will the next chapter be monday week if so it is going to be a long week but it will be worth the wait
love to all xxx

MickeyMomma said...

Outstanding, as always!
Brought tears to my eyes, on more then one occasion!
As always, can't wait for the next chapter!

irene maldonado said...

Thanks so Much for posting this Chapter!!! I cant wait for the next Chapter!! have a Great weekend. Happy birthday to your daughter!

irene maldonado said...

This was A Fantastic Chapter!! Thanks So Much. Cant Wait for the next Chapter!! Hope you have a Great Weekend. Happy Birthday to your Daughter!!

mzthang said...

Emine you always know how to make us happy. I actually screamed when I saw the new chapter and called my aunt in NY (yes I have her hooked and we screamed together.

The part with his mom was so touching and the gentleman who helped them was so sweet. I hope there will be a future reference on how Christian re-payed his kindness.

Oh and I cannot forget Ros. I absolutely love her. Thanks for another wonderful chapter Emine as I look forward to the one where his mom let Mrs. Robinson have it :-)

Hugs from the Caribbean.

~*PaKaHaJa*~ said...

Oh Emine, what an AWESOME surprise for a Sunday morning.. I have your blog set to open up first thing when I turn my computer on, and as it came on, a new chapter!!! THANK YOU sooo much!!!!!

This is one of the chapters that I've been waiting for, you wrote it perfectly. Again I felt all of Christian's emotions and his love for Ana. Can't wait for the beginning of the next chapter, oh hell, the rest of the book.. :D :D

Have a good weekend...

Anonymous said...

love it, you already now that christian is going to pay for Len's son's care.

I love the interaction between Christian and Ros, I couldn't stop laughing especially after ros complementing christian and he only having to say that she should quit smoking. HAHA

cant wait for more as always :D


Anonymous said...

Thank You Emine for this fantastic chapter! I look forward to each and every chapter. You truly have a gift for this. I'm in awe of all you do and never disappoint us true grey-hard fans!!!


Anonymous said...

Emine, great chapter. Love balsy Ros, Len was a great character to place into the mix, and you are so clever!!!!! All the technical details of the helicopter blew me away.
Happy Birthday to your beautiful little girl, Rayah.
Thanks again for your efforts.
Yours Smiling
Kathy x (Australia)

Brigie said...

Very very good. Now do I have to wait another week??? That's a big ask!!!

Anonymous said...

What a great surprise this is! Loved this chapter! You have made my weekend :) Wendy from NZ!

ann1954. said...

PHi Emine,
Amazing chapter!! I was not at all aware of Fan Fiction before I stumbled onto your blog about two weeks ago, quite by accident. It's great! I'm loving the story told from Christian's POV. You're very good at this...thanks for sharing.
I look forward to your next chapter.

Catarina* said...

I loved this Eminé, I truly did! You never forget anything, and I can't thank you enough for putting so much time and effort at making this so perfect! I don't know anything about helicopters or whatever, but you explained so well!

I loved the conversation between Christian and Ros, they were so sweet! I loved when he talked about Ana and told Ros that her gaydar was working again :p

The man that help them is somewhat what we all should be, a kind person with is own problems but that takes is time to help others in need. It's both sad and sweet how Christian was so surprised with the man's kindness! As someone said already, I sure hope to see a reference about what Christian did to help Len's son :)
It's not like he is going to pay for Len's help, but more like helping him with what he can :)

I always thought about what Christian was feeling when Grace hugged him like that. I mean, it was the first time and he barely had time to think! You talked from his own heart Eminé. As I'm always saying, somehow, you are Christian when you are writing! All of his emotions...I was just keep remembering what Ana was thinking when they were all there waiting for news of Christian, that if only he could see how much people loved him and cared for him...and he not only saw, but understood as well :)

You know, this is one of my favorite chapters. All the ones where you can give us more of Christian are awesome! I'm so looking forward to his talk with Grace after she discovers his...thing with Elena :p That is going to be powerful!

You daughter is the sweetest! She is so beautiful and has such lovely eyes! Really, if I saw her on the street, I would immediately though "What a sweet little girl" :D

I'm sure she looks like you :)

Thank you so much for giving us this chapter earlier :D

A big kiss to you, proud mommy :)


Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Welcome Ann! Wonderful to have you here! Number of my readers hasn’t heard about fan fiction before, but now they do. It's not a new phenomenon, but I'm glad it exists; otherwise I'd have to invent it.

Hi Kathy! Most people who don't know about small town Americans hold prejudices against them. But I've met some wonderful, sweet locals, and wanted to bring some of them to life in Len. They love their families, they know their Bible, they respect their pastor, and local gossip spreads faster than wildfire. Things that are different may be looked upon with curiosity, and not always judgment. Of course, if you want to advertise something, it's better to go to people like Mrs. Shubert than the local paper because their mouths work faster than any paper can print. But all in all, they're honest, decent people. I wanted bring all of that to surface.

Brigie, I'll try not to make you wait another week. But some chapter require a lot of research, and I have read quite a few manuals just to write accurately for Charlie Tango, and they were either in German, or French or Polish. But this will come in handy in upcoming chapters when he's getting his helicopter incident investigated. Technical reads can quickly get boring (trust me; I translate quite a few manuals). I tried to make it interesting.
Claire-you’re very right. I’m not sure if I’m going to write a separate chapter about it, or just make it a part of one yet. We’ll see.
Gail-you’re a super cheerleader! Thank you xx
Mzthang-you and your aunt made me laugh! As I write, Ros’s character just comes forward. Women are women-they love their shoes and purses. In fact we were organizing our closet yesterday, and my husband was saying maybe I should just have 8 pairs of shoes and donate the rest that I don’t use often; he made me laugh so hard! Of the 8, four of them are sneakers, 2 pairs of sandals and 2 heels. We get overprotective of our shoes and purses, so I thought Ros would demonstrate that. Admittedly, I have more books than shoes and clothes combined, but what I have, I love, so, I told him I’m keeping them.
Martha & MickeyMomma – I hope you liked what you read. I was trying to visualize every scene, landing his helicopter, long way home, his interactions with Ros, his reunion with family, and of course with Ana. A lot of it was packed with tons of emotions, and this is one place he has no bubble protecting him-no layers of security, none of those things money can buy. So he’s in the open, and vulnerable. He always assumed that he had to protect himself from people and I wanted to show the shock he had meeting decent ordinary people, and show that he wasn’t the only one who has had difficulties in life. Another step in the process of growing up.
Irene, Wendy, Kate, Ana, Cynthia, Donna – it’s always a pleasure to hear from you all, and I look forward to your reaction each time. Hope you are all well!

nadine said...

so wasnt expecting this till monday!! now im sobbing like a baby.. cant wait to read the birthday party chapter :D Amazing chapter as always. And happy birthday to your beautiful daughter Rayah!

Anonymous said...

This was fantastic. I cried like a baby reading it, how did you ever get through writing this without shedding a tear? Tell me you shed a tear or three. :):)

suev57 said...

Another great job! I especially loved the truck driver and hope that you will include a reward for this man from Christian in a following chapter! Hard to find such kind people in this world.

Just as in the the books, I couldn't stop crying during this chapter as well. Imagine finding the person you love the most in this world, only to be tortured by not knowing if they are alive or dead. And then, at the end, being overcome with such joy that all will be right in your world again. What joy it brings to my heart.

Thank you for another great chapter in the telling of Christian's story.

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Thank you anonymous and Suev57. Do I cry when I write? Yes. That's why I like to write alone. But, then sometimes I have to take a lot of breaks if a particular chapter is too overwhelming. This one I had to write in chunks and I couldn't leave my desk because I didn't want to forget what I had to write. I have a box of Kleenex sitting at my desk :)

Anonymous said...


That was great. Your great. Loves the chapters cant wait for the next one. Do u kno when I might post next chapter?

Celeste (az)

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Possibly upcoming Saturday Celeste. Sometimes I can post early if I only work on a single project, or two. If I have 3 or more, then, it becomes impossible. Currently I only have one.

Catarina* said...

Eminé, I don't know nothing about Physics, you really are intelligent, so versed in languages but in sciences too! :D

As for your little girl, she is a gift to the world my dear, because I'm sure that as soon as she grows up, she will be making the difference in the lives of the ones that are going to have the privilege to meet her, just like you make the difference in our lives :)

With a mother like you, and a father like your husband, she will be such a sensitive kid/adult, just like the world needs :)

And I'm glad that she is a gift to your father in that way, it's soo good to be able to remember our loved ones in different ways :)

A big kiss, waiting for next Saturday for the next chapter!

Have a nice week sweetie :)


cat675 said...


Great chapter. I loved all the details. All the techy stuff and the truck driver conversation. Great details you never cease to amaze your readers.

Misblue said...

Hello Emine.
Your write is just amazing! I discovered your blog after I finishing the 3 books and with that feeling of "and now what? this can't end like this". I've been reading all your chapters like an addicted, and they don't stop to amaze me! I find myself almost counting the days until you post a new chapter.
Thanks a lot for your wonderful job!

Anonymous said...

I love this. i just found the blog a week ago and im all. caught up! can't wait for more. you absolutely capture the essence of these characters!

Anonymous said...

This was a great surprise to see this today. I was so excited. Can't wait for the next chapter!! I've given this link to several coworkers and my mom so they could rea t also.


booba said...

I recently stumbled across CG's perspective and im so glad I did!! I love reading and you write well! Very well! Thank you for writing this with such obvious passion, im not sure what we would do without you!! I've enjoyed every chapter immensely and can not wait for next weeks chapter!!
Once again thank you for giving an almost 40 year old a lot of enjoyment !!
Happy birthday to your little girl!! :-)

Pixie said...

Happy Birthday to your beautiful little girl and I wanted to say thank you for sharing. You are truly talented and seem like a very kind and caring woman.

Anonymous said...

Sounds great. Cant wait. Happy b day to ur daughter she has gorgeous eyes.

Celeste (az)

Keisha said...

Loved this chapter, as always! Happy Birthday to your beautiful Rayah. She's adorable. I look forward to the next chapter :)

Rachel Smith said...

I just wanted to say...I loved every word you wrote...I was on the edge of my seat...I was sobbing and my daughter came in to my bedroom where I was reading this, and was confused, she didn't know why mommy was crying! I just wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am truly impressed and in awe by you. You put so much passion and work so deligently to make this story come alive. I know I am speaking for everyone here, but you are amazing!!!

BTW I wish you little angel a very happy birthday!! She is beautiful and I can see she is a sweet thing!!!

I am looking forward to the next chapter, can't wait til Elena gets put into her place, and gets a glass of Lemoncello tossed into her face, and I so can't wait for Grace's reaction about the affair between her and Christian. I know it will be brilliantly written, and look forward to reading it.
Thanks again sweet Emine!!!

Raquel Braido said...

Wow!I don't even know what to say! I'm in awe of you sweetie. It is beautiful to see what you can do with this story. Like Catarina said, it really feels like you are Christian. You know, I heard someone saying that a true artist can make his audience feel exactly what he's feeling and you my friend, are a true artist and I promise you I'll always be here to support everyhting you do.
I can tell you, from the bottom of my heart, that YOU ARE one of the most amazing writers I know! I thank God for this privilege.
Now, I heard those songs and thought about Christian but you just made them look better. You're a genius! :)
I can't wait for the next chapter sweetie.

Oh you're daughter is so cute! *-* Happy birthday Rayah! ♥

Love you!♥

Backsassing said...

Dear Emine, Once again I am floored by all the details and back story you provide, it has made this series so much richer and interesting for me.
I will send her a little Buddhist mantra I learned Kripalu a while ago..
May Rayah be happy.
May Rayah be healthy.
May Rayah be free from danger,
and may Rayah live life with ease.

Anonymous said...

One of the best if not THE BEST chapter I've read so far! I absolutely love how you write! I feel as though I'm part of the story when I'm reading it. I think I may even like this book better than the original! : ) You are amazingly talented and I can't wait for the next chapter!


Jana said...

I don't have words for how much I love this story. Each chapter builds a more complex character in Christian and I love it. It really was what I needed since I have been sick since Thursday. Thank you for making me feel better and not think about feeling bad for a while. A definite re-read is called for.

queenb52 said...

Great chapter...I literally choked up over Christian's bewildered response to the out-pouring of love from his family...

Anxiously awaiting the next installment!

Jerri said...

This was one of my favorite chapters. I loved how you had Ana in his head as he was trying to land the helicopter. Will you be working on Book 3 in Christian POV?

Thanks for writing this for all of Fifty Shades fan.

Anonymous said...

Emine, thanks for another fab chapter ! my favourite so far, though cannot wait till the birthday party and proposal at the boat house too x (UK reader and fan )

Anonymous said...

Love it! Thank you!

Lisa Ansell said...

this made me cry i have just been told my son has speech problem he is 3 years old and is my world so i really felt for Len thank you for the update loving every part of it and can hardly wait for the next Lisa xxxx

Anonymous said...

Amazing chapter! I was completely unaware of Fan Fiction until I stumbled upon your blog almost two weeks ago, quite by accident I might add...and I'm delighted I that I did! I'm loving Fifty Shades told from Christian's POV. You are extremely talented...thank you so much for sharing. I can't wait for the next chapter!!

Take Care,

P.S. A Happy and Blessed Birthday to Your Beautiful Little Girl!

Anonymous said...

Hello Emine,
Amazing Chapter! I was completely unaware of Fan Fiction until I stumbled onto your blog quite by accident,and I'm delighted that I did. You are extremely talented, and I'm loving your version of the story told from Christian's POV. Thank you so much for sharing your passion...cant wait for the next chapter!

Take Care,

P.S. A Happy and Blessed Birthday to Your Beautiful Little Girl!

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Karina, Debbie, Misblue, Booba: Welcome! I’m glad you’ve stumbled your way into my blog. Hope you’ll like the upcoming chapters. Which brings to Jerri’s question.

Jerri-Yes, I’ll write the book 3 from Christian’s POV. But what I’ll do with that one is, divide it into 2 books as opposed to just 1. A lot of the readers kind of felt cheated as the story went fast forward, and we didn’t get to meet the baby Ted, but we find her pregnant with the second child. So, I’ll go through the 1st child experience, and we’ll have other adventures, and I’ll reserve the second child’s story for a 4th book. That way we’re not missing anything.

Lisa Ansell-With Len’s story I thought I would voice insecurities of ordinary people. Everyone has problems, everyone has something that worries them, and not two are alike. Just wanted to bring the human element forward; people who are inherently very different (sexual orientation, religion, social status, living standards, life’s circumstances, norms) can get along, have respect for one another, and in fact do acts of kindness to one another. There is a well-known Turkish author. Elif Shafak who was a professor at University of Arizona (author of 40 Rules of Love). She gave a profound speech I’ve heard once where she was describing the 1999 earthquake in Istanbul which claimed over 18,000 dead and nearly 49,000 injured. She spoke about one particular scene in the aftermath about two very different people. One was a transvestite man who lived well outside the societal norms, and the other a very religious grocery store owner. In the aftermath, both the men rushed outside, people are crying, looking for loved ones, everyone’s world is shaken up. At this moment, the transvestite man is crying his mascara and make up is running, and the grocery store owner is shaken up having lost so much, and in that moment, at a small stand, these two men stand together, two fellow human beings, both teary eyed and share a cigarette. In the moments of tragedy, death, or emergencies, we are at our basic element. Simply human. Rest is just details. I wanted to bring human forward in that scene. Everyone is different; everyone has some sort of worries, and though in the end the roads might just cross and each goes on their own particular way, we learn about one another, and for once have empathy for the other.

So Lisa, I think you are the perfect mom your child could ever hope for because of the way you love him. Boys tend to talk slower or have more speech issues than girls. It can be fixed. My son had it as well, and he has no problems now. They don’t come with handbook (which would make life immensely easier), each child is different. Just love him, help him where he needs help and give him self-esteem. We moms worry a lot. Somehow everything has a way of working out.

Queenb52-love of our family is something we all crave, but in his case, I think he stopped expecting love, feeling undeserving, and at the time of tragedy, people, his family forgot all the barriers he erected, and that’s the best kind of love. Just flooding through.

Emma Hicks said...

Hi there emine.
Another fantastic chapter I loved it. I came across your blog a while back after reading the 50 shades trilogy and I have followed it and read chapter by chapter every time you post.
Your writing is great and i enjoy reading from Christians pov. I look forward to the next chapter and thank you.
Emma in the uk x

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Welcome Emma! I'm glad you said hello. I like Christian and Ana and how they became a part of the lives of so many people. With weekly installments now, it feels like we get to visit their particular universe. I like writing about them, and I'm so happy that you like the end results.

Cynthia Settimo said...

You talk about book 3 from Christians POV as well as a book 4 becuae we were some what cheated on Ana's pregnancy, the birth of Ted Etc... I hope with Christians POV in book 3 you add some detail between the proposal and where it picks up on the honeymoon. I felt a little cheated in there. The sulk, his dads reaction to Elena, The prenup stuff..... I cannot wait to see what you have for us next.

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

I think there are a few missing pieces such as the vows, parents private reaction to his decision to get married, Carrick pushing him to sign a prenup... of course there is also Christian getting private security for his family, the wedding (we missed the whole thing), then we have a good glimpse of the honeymoon, but pregnancy, especially with the first child, and we know the birth was difficult, and the reaction of Mrs. Jones and Taylor to a baby, moving into the new house, Kate and Elliot getting married, and there is so much that could go on in between.

I want to fill all those gaps. I have to write the outline so I have a clear idea of the path I need to follow.

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Remind me some of the things that are missing and you would like to see, because I have to make a list, and from the list I have to draw the outlines for the stories.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, your very detailed. Please continue with the rest of Darker and Freed. My friends and I ARE ADDICTED!!

Anonymous said...

Please write more of Dr Flynn's sessions - I really wanted to know how he feels about Ana and christian - especially after they went through so much together, from touching, to his mum and dad finding out about elena (I want to hear his reactions to her) and everything in between.

plus the bride and groom need a bachelor party!

Claire UK :D

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Claire, you're brilliant! You gave me a great idea! What would happen if Kate and the girls from Ana's work threw her a bachelorette party with a male stripper or two or take her to Chip and Dale or something like that? How would 50 react to this? It'll be so much fun to write it-I'm grinning ear to ear :))

Khadene said...

I was also interested in the other parts of their honeymoon. We don't know what happens at all.

Anonymous said...

:D Glad I can help plus I think 50 will go ballistic HAHA I can see it now!

Thoughts on christian bachelor party? - These would have to include Taylor, Sawyer, Ros (poss gwen?), Claude, Elliot, Mac, Ethan, Carrick and Dr Flynn.
(I think he would only include those people who truly stood up to him and didn't take his crap)

Cant wait :D

Claire :D

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

I can see Ros as one of the "guys". I have to think of ways how they can crash each other's party... I have some ideas. I gotta think devious. Hmm..

Raquel Braido said...

OMG! I can see that a lot of awesome things are going to happen in the future around here! CLAIRE YOU ARE A GENIUS! I'm sure Emine will make us all laugh with something like that. I would love to see him go ballistic! haha
I'm too excited now! I'm already picuting it in my head! lol IT WILL BE SO FUN! Oh man, I love this blog!♥

Anonymous said...

i soooo excited about your idea! cant wait to read all the missing gaps prior to wedding and pregnancy etc. Claudia, UK reader and fan

Anonymous said...

I am so excited to hear about all the gaps getting filled in! This will be so much fun. I'm dying to know where Christian went all day/night after he found out about Ana's pregnancy. We know what he did the first night with Elena when he couldn't find Dr. Flynn but he gave her the silent treatment for a few days and just disappeared but showed up at night watching her sleep. I'm dying to know what he was doing and what he was thinking during that time. I'm so looking forward to it! Thanks Emine for all that you do.


Anonymous said...

When can we ecxpect the next chapter??!! I don't think any of us can wait..

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

I'll post the new chapter sometime Saturday.

I'm really drowning in work. I got a new section of the book to translate, and it over 38,000 words. I'm practically going out of my mind because of the looming deadline.:( But I will of course always make time to write the new chapter. Somehow writing about 50, centers my sanity. Therefore, I will always make time for writing :)

Pixie said...

You absolutely need to do the bachelor party. I totally picture Elliot wanting to throw him a wild party and maybe him even feeling a little gun shy about that. I like your idea of the girls throwing Ana a wild party and him going all fifty on her and them.

We need to hear about the disagreement with the vows,and the prenup talk. I agree with one of the other readers that we got some of the honeymoon but we missed out on most of London and all of Paris.

I would like to hear more about the wedding planning, her getting her dress made by Kate's mom. The night before the wedding and more on the wedding itself. Her walking down the aisle, his feelings, her talk with her mom the night before. There are so many missing pieces.

Like you mentioned we really did not get to hear or see the whole pregnancy, (both of them). Also Kate and Elliot's wedding...did they change the date because of Teddy coming around the sametime?

I agree too that we need more with Dr Flynn. Did Ana see him again because in book 2 he did say they should come back again together for another session.

Something that was hinted at on a few times but no real resolution was Carla's third marriage and what really happened and did he try anything with Ana. She always said they didnt get along but did not elaborate..hmm.

All these missing pieces. Hopefully you can address them or us.

But those are some of my missing pieces...if I think of any more I will let you know.
thank you again for doing this. I really enjoy your story and it is so much fun. Keeps us going until the movie...if it ever gets made. lol

Anonymous said...

Your an amazing writer! I have so many of my friends hooked onto this site, keep up the EXCELLENT work :)

Anonymous said...

I loved the interaction with Christian and Ros. I'm so torn with wanting more of your chapters and never wanting the updates to end! I love your writing and it really does fill that void after rereading the three books. Your writing is fantastic. Thanks for doing this. It is amazing you are almost at one million page views!!!!

Sarah H said...

Beautiful as always!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Emine,
I have already commented on this chapter, but here I am again.. As everyone seems to be putting in their "2 bobs worth", I thought I would jump on board.
Please, at some stage I would love some interaction between Gail and Taylor, these two for some reason fire my imagination. I have requested this before but don't know if you saw the comment. Anyway, thankyou for your efforts and we, your readers, know you can't fulfill all our requests.
Have a great day,
Yours smiling
Kathyxx (Australia)

Anonymous said...

It would b interesting if they strippers they hired for cg turned out to be some or 1 of his 15, would he tell ana? Would he acknowledge he knew of her? Jenni xx

Tash said...

Hi babe. It's been a while since I commented. Don't think it's because I haven't been reading I have. It's probably my biggest secret (or not so secret) pleasure. I can't wait for the next chapter. You are amazing. I own a hair salon in Australia and I would say at least 90o/o of my clients I have recommended to read your blog. Keep it coming. You're an inspiration much love Tash ����

Catarina* said...

Omg everyone said parts of what I think! Like you said Eminé, the story in the third book was so fast forward that we missed a lot! I never understood why she didn't write more at the beginning and at the end! Why the big leap?

But now I'm so happy that she didn't! Because the best chapters here are the ones where you can give us more of Christian, where you haven't to follow the book so much! And all that missing pieces...knowing all that from Christian's mind! Oh, what joy you will bring us Eminé :D

You definitely make our lives so much better and I love you and your story for that!

I will now reply to your email my dear :)

Missing you and Christian already!


Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Kathy! It's so good to hear from you, I've missed you my friend! Gail and Taylor are going to come up soon. How have you been?

Tash-If I lived in Australia, I'd be in your salon every week. My hair grew two inches since I last went to pamper myself; I think I have to spoil myself when I finish this work project in my hand. I seem to have an unglamorous ponytail all the time now. If I neglect it too much my best friend will drag me to an emergency hair appointment, she said.

Catarina and Anonymous – I know there is so much to write about. That’s why I’m looking forward you guys to fill in the missing pieces you want to see. It’ll be so much fun. I’m spending today to write about 50.

Anonymous said...

If u want something based on 50 shades that's funny and compleatly opposite to what Christian and ana have a look for fifty shames of earl grey" its really funny. I found my copy on ebay :0) jenni xx

Cynthia Settimo said...

Oh I cannot wait for all the chapters on the missing pieces... Although from the sound of it those missing pieces might have to be written from both points of view.... That would be interesting.... Cannot wait. Thank you Again!

Rachel Smith said...

I am so looking forward to your POV with the wedding, and later Ana's pregnancy with Teddy. I can't wait, it will be a phenomenal addition I have no doubt because your are a brilliant writer.

Tash said...

Haha. Well I just got back from the states. If I knew I would have made a home visit. But if you're every in my neighbour just let me know. I'll sort you out. If you quaff your fringe back and pull your ponytail up higher its a quick hair disaster fix. Always stylish. Keep up the good work. Waiting with baited breathe for the next chapter much love Tash xx

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

How are your 3 boys Tash? Did you bring them to Las Vegas? I just remembered that you were going to renew your 10 year vows. Damn woman! If I remembered, I would have crashed your party with Elvis renewing your vows :) Happy 10th Anniversary! Did you guys have a good time? I think we'll go again soon, maybe in Winter Break or something.

I'm so glad you're safely back home! Tell me how it was.. Love! xx

Rosebud said...

OMG!!! this is so good! Can't wait for the next chapter!!

Tash said...

Yeah babe it was awesome!!!!!! Can't wait to come back. I fell in love the states and the people. If I'd know you we're close I would have invited you. The boys loved it. We only flew in late yesterday. I'm coming back in April for the coachella festival by myself so I can't wait. If you're ever in QLD /gold coast, Brisbane area let me know. Would love to have a drink with you much love Tash xx

Anonymous said...

Just a friendly hello from Wendy in NZ!!!! Sooooooooooo can't wait for your next amazing chapter! Hope you have had a great week! Xo

Anonymous said...

Hi Emine,
I know I'm being selfish, I keep checking back everyday hoping that you might post early. So excited...can't wait for the next chapter!! Thank you so much for sharing your passion for Fifty with us.

Take Cake

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Debbie-I am still working on the new chapter, but I'll finish it today to appease everyone tomorrow :)

Wendy- how have you been? I've had a busy week with work, and was helping kids' school for fundraising yesterday evening.

Tash- It's wonderful that you had a great time. Vegas is about 5 or 6 hrs of drive for us depending on how many potty breaks we have to make for kids along the way :)it's gotten more family friendly. I'm glad you're coming back. I love the American west (primarily because I don't shovel snow here), although every state has so many wonderful people. A couple of years ago, I was working on a software project in Virginia, and had my kids with me and couple of galpals, and one of our producers and we went to Monticello (Thomas Jefferson's house). We wanted to do wine tasting, and buy some bottles for souvenirs. Anyway, I was driving, and on the way back, my GPS on my phone wouldn't work, and we kinda got lost. It was a Sunday and couldn't find anyone to ask directions. So, I found an old church and no one was in. I finally knocked on someone's door home to ask directions. I apologized for interrupting them, and told them that we were lost. The family had company and were having dinner. Those strangers were extremely kind to us, invited us in to join them for dinner, we declined, we wanted to get going, and they wrote out the directions to the freeway, and I would never forget their kindness.

Our people are great. Hope you make many more trips back to the States. I have Australia in my bucket list, so I will come :)

Anonymous said...

Hi when you was saying about the next book I was half way through book 3 (for the 6th time hehe) will you be doing more on mia's kidnap and how ana got away with shooting Hyde even though it was self defence surely in the real world it would still be classed as wounding with intent. I'm so glad its Saturday tomorrow I can't wait to keep reading your amazing work jenni xx

Tash said...

WOW. It's great to see the kindness of others. I honestly couldn't say a bad thing about any of the people we met and we met a lot. It amazed me home much it felt like home. My boys asked me if we could move there. It's hard to explain to them but I have to say I'd move in a heartbeat :). I can't wait to come back and funny enough Virginia is one of the p,aces I want to go. I'd love to travel thru all the little towns to give my boys a real sense of the world and the wonderful people in it. We can't wait to come back again with the whole family. But I'm super excited to come back on my own ;) ;). Hope you and your family are happy and healthy. It a joy to hear you speak of your family. Stay safe and you're all in my thoughts and prayers. Much love Tash xx

queenb52 said...

fMia just have to be the wedding planner when you write that chapter....just imaging her driving everyone bonkers!!!

Anonymous said...

Love ur writing!! Just wanted to throw it out there as an additional fill in the blanks section : what about more from Christians childhood such as his adoption and time spent at the foster home. Or even college and when he quite and his parents reaction or how he was treated at high school ect..
I love the other suggestions as well, I think they're great ideas.


Ann54ontheSevern said...

Hi Emine,
How are you? I hope all is well. I don't know if I happened to mention that E.L.James was on the Katie Couric show this past Monday...she was great!! It was a really good show. A few days later Katie revealed that there had been a question and answer session at the end of that show. An audience member asked the author if she would ever consider writing a part for herself in the upcoming movie. She surprised everyone when she divulged that she has already written herself into the the Fifty Shades story as a very, very, minor character, and challenges all the readers to figure out who it is. Oh well, I guess I'll have to go back and reread the books again. That can wait until I'm finished with Christian's POV. Thank you again.

Take Cake,

Anonymous said...

We are desperately waiting for the new chapter ;)

Anonymous said...

As a newbie, may I make a few suggestions of my own?
First, Emine, you are, Amazing!
I would find it helpful if,there were no pictures of, Christian and/or, Ana. They have to remain figments of our own imagination for in the end, we all know who Chistian looks like. One thing I think I would never see on Christian are, tattoo's. In fact, I think Ana doesn't care for tattoos?
May I also suggest some music that, I think would fit in with so many of the 'situations ' in the story? How about the theme music from ' The Onedin Line' when we read the description of, soaring, and/or sailing? And, perhaps, after the 'break up', try Nat King Cole singing 'Smile'?
Perhaps, tongue in cheek, the 1812 overture would fit in with so many of, Christian and Ana's experiences together? In the meantime, I will wait (just one of many) to read your next post. And, today is, Saturday! I shall get out my, English, Lady Grey tea, the one that comes in a Black box, and which my relatives send from England. The kettle is on! Thank you, Emine!

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

I'll post the new chapter within two hours or maybe less... Few tweaks left.

Lisa Ansell said...

Emine Thank you so much for your kind words and yes we mums worry ALOT :) he is my world and it has turned my life upside down for a while but i no me and his dad will and do give him all of our love :) we will always support him and very thankful to his pre school teachers who are helping him now too thank you once again you truly are an amazing woman Lisa xxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Emine, I like that you put photos in your posts. Even though the guy's picture you use doesn't look like my "mind's eye" Christian, I do like having the visual as I read. You do such an amazing job, and I so look forward to your post every week. It gives me a break from the monotony of the Groundhog Day in which I live. Thank you so much for what you do for all of us to enjoy. Gina

Anjelica said...

Omg I was so estatic when I found your blog! When I finished all 3 books I wanted more. Thank you so much Emine for taking the time out to write this, it is absolutley amazing. I can't wait for the next chapter, it is hard living in the UK and being 5 hours ahead.

I love the comments about filling in gaps from the original books. I think the stripper idea is amazing and we can see how 50 Christian will go. I love Ana and Christian's relationship. Christian will beeven more protective when they get married.

I am also excited to read the scene where Ana gets touched up in the club and 50 goes mental.
I was so happy when I found out Kate and Elliot got married. Even though its fictional, this book makes me feel so many emotions, its a roller coaster ride! Keep writing and I wish you and your family well. I can't wait for the next book.

Nieves said...

I loved finally knowing what happened during the hours that Christian was missing. Thank you for the great writing!!! Keep it up!!

Annette Tomplait said...

What an awesome chapter, you never fail to surprise us. This was such a great read. LOVED IT!

Jenfer said...


Thank you for explaining the Alex Pella story. I only got to read a little the other night after you sent it to me, but tonight, after a full belly of turkey and all the trimmings, I will relax and begin the story again.
He sounds very interesting, and I am looking forward to reading it!

Happy Turkey Day to you!

Love & Laters,

Jade Linseman said...

thank you for making the truck driver from mitchell south dakota im from rapid city south dakota even though it is across the state in made me feel good reading that ... then in the next chapter i have never figured out why christian deposited 50,000 in to ana account and that was then end of it never to be mentioned again

Eminé Fougner @ Cowboyland said...

Hi Jade!

I've met some people both from Rapid City and Mitchell. S. Dakota has some very solid and nice people, very friendly,neighborly; people who watch out for the well-being of one another at times. A few years ago, I was very pregnant with my daughter, and had a flat tire. It's quite hot here in AZ. I was going to call either my husband, or auto club depending on who would come fastest, but this truck driver stopped, from Mitchell I think. I remember that his belly was as big as mine. He stopped on the freeway and changed my tire. He was from SD. His name was Len. I never forgot that. And that's how the truck driver come about.

People forget that there are nice people around. So, this was a good opportunity to write about that.

Jozie said...

This was one of the most awesome chapters you wrote. I think you did great with the wording of the terms about Charile. Tango! Great job!

hg said...

Hi Emine,

after reading the trilogy books your blog is the third fanfiction about the characters Anastasia and Christian findung and fighting for love which I'm following now.

This chapter will be my favorite one, because there are long parts without Ana but with lots of emotions and technical details. Thanks.


Anonymous said...

Hi Emine,
A happy end. Love it! I do love all those moments and explanations that were missing in the E.L. James' books.
This truck driver was so nice with Ross and Christian. A good man indeed. It's so rare today!
Grace is so touching, hugging and kissing her son, crying with joy, relief and worry together. A very good mom. That allows us to see how much she loves her children. And Mia and Elliott, always the same ones!! Lol!

Going on to read the next chapters! :)

S. from France