Ex-Subs and New Rivals - Elena's Story

EX-SUBS AND NEW RIVALS

Esclava is on my speed dial as always, of course. It’s one of my busiest salons. I press two numbers, and the phone starts ringing.

“Thank you for calling Esclava. This is Greta. How may I help you?” answers Greta professionally. I approve.

“Greta, this is Mrs. Lincoln. I need you to send Franco here within the hour.”

“We’re quite busy here today ma’am. And Franco is booked with some of his regular clients for the next three hours. May I send someone else, or would it be okay if Franco comes after he is through with all his clients?”

“Greta!” I bellow firmly. “Did I give you any indication that I wanted to know what Franco’s schedule is like for the next three hours? I simply asked you to send him over here. You do as you are told. You’re not in a position to tell me what to do.”

“No, ma’am, of course not!” she tries to respond.

“Do NOT interrupt me when I am speaking to you. Remember who signs your paycheck! Franco is to be here within the hour,” I say and I can feel her shudder as she’s gasping.

“Yes ma’am,” she responds feebly. “Who shall I call to fill in for Franco, ma’am?” she asks in a meek voice.

“I’ll send someone from here,” I say and hang up.

Christian only loves Franco’s haircuts, and I have a dinner date with him tonight. I have to be shooting on all my pistons tonight. So, Franco is the man to do my hair.

I get out of my office, and walk through the salon. Christian and I own some of the most upscale beauty salons in Seattle catering to the crème dela crème of the city. We’re always booked in weeks in advance and our clients pay the top price. Christian is a silent partner. I run the business.

“Annabel,” I call.

“Yes, ma’am,” she responds politely.

“I will need you when you are done with your client. Come to my office please,” I say coolly.

“Of course, ma’am,” she responds. I like professionalism in my work place. I want my employees to be efficient, professional, and obedient.

I had waxed and had my body cleared of any sort of hair two days ago. It’s never a good idea to get waxed on a special day. You will be red, and unsightly. My body is smooth and my eyebrows shaped properly.

When Annabel comes in, I have her do my manicure and pedicure immaculately. Once I’m done getting my manicure and pedicure done, Franco comes in.

“How may I serve you Mrs. Lincoln?” he says animatedly.

“Hello Franco,” I reply. “I want you to give me my usual haircut, and do some color touch ups, please.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Franco starts cutting my hair efficiently, and in the style I like. He starts some small talk about God knows what. But my mind is preoccupied with Christian, and the change in his demeanor. I’m not in the mood to listen any small talk at all.

“Franco, turn it down a notch,” I say, confusing his little Italian mind.

“Down a notch, ma’am?” he asks in his Italian accent.

“Yes. In fact it’d be best if you turn it off altogether.” He’s confused further.

“Turn what off ma’am?” he waves his hand flustered.

“Your voice!” I say pointedly. Franco’s hand flies to his chest in a grand gesture as if I’ve broken his Italian heart. His face grimaces.

“I’m sorry dear, but I’m in a temper today, and I just like to gather my thoughts in silence,” I say. He’s a valued employee, and I don’t want to lose him today because of a mousy gold digging bimbo.

Franco puts his hand holding the scissors to his hip, and the one with the comb waves in the air as he shakes his head in a grand gesture then lands his hand with the comb over his heart.

“Well! Mrs. Lincoln,” he says his hand with the comb still onto his chest as if to calm his speedy heart, “you have no idea dear, how much you hurt my feelings!”

“I’m sorry Franco! My head is just preoccupied today,” I say trying to save the situation.

“I thought something was up ma’am” he says adding “becuz’ frankly, all my clients come to me for my skills and my grand personality! You’re bellissima Mrs. Lincoln, but your attitude today, not so bellissima!” he says with a swipe of his head. And thank God, he’s quiet after that.

“Thank you Franco,” I say after he’s done cutting and styling my hair.

“Grazie ma’am.”

I don’t understand why I’m so nervous meeting Christian this evening. We have had dinner almost every week for years, especially since we’ve become business partners.

I know it in my heart! It’s the shift in Christian’s attitude and behavior. He’s different. It’s different this time. I want to find out for sure. I hope it’s not what I think it is.

I keep recalling what he said during the last phone conversation we’ve had. But what interests me is what he didn’t say.

When I called him on Thursday, he was short with me. All I wanted to do was to schedule this dinner with him.

“Elena, I can’t speak to you right now!” he said brusquely.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb your business activities Christian,” I said to him.

“I’m with Anastasia right now. Just e-mail me if there’s nothing important,” he said.

“But it’s Thursday!” I protested.

“And your point being?” he said callously.

“Oh.. I just haven’t seen you in a while, and was wondering if we could have dinner.”

“I can’t give you a date right now Elena. E-mail!” he said  and hung up on me! He’s never, EVER done that, especially on a week day. I had always been respectful of his time Friday through Sunday as he had his subs, and was busy. For the last nearly seven years, he’s never broken this rule. EVER! It’s the new sub! She’s doing it!

Christian would normally discuss with me any new sub he would get under his contract. He would bring them by the salon to get made up, and I would rate them for him; almost from the beginning. But he’s not done this with this one, neither did he make any attempt to show her to me. I accidentally found out he has a new sub. I really have an ominous feeling that this one is different. I don’t want Christian to get hurt, and she might be a gold digger who wants to get her claws on him! I care about Christian. He doesn’t do well with emotions. It’s best for him to be detached. All his earlier teenage problems were due to overwhelming emotions he’s experienced. I had to teach him to channel them out. It took me a long time to have him show mastery over his emotions. I don’t want someone to get her paws on him, and take advantage of him by showing him a fucking emotion like love!

I loathe it! What did it do for me? Nothing! I loved a man once. He loved me too. In fact he loved me black and blue and to the point of breaking my nose and arm for loving Christian at the same time. Extreme emotions are detrimental. Especially for people like Christian, because when he feels something, he really feels it, deep to his core. But he’s still like an adolescent in many ways. Someone needs to watch out for him. Playing the field, and having no emotional attachment has been beneficial for him, and that’s what the subs provided for him before. He’s not ready for a relationship. Someone needs to protect him, and clearly he’s not doing it himself right now. But I can’t reprimand him because he’s not my sub. Not anymore. If he was, he wouldn’t even be getting near one of them...not without me beating the shit out of him! I think fondly of those times. He was the best sub I ever had. We could still go that way, but he likes to dominate. I could be his sub should he wish. But, I don’t want to damage what we currently have. It’s a delicate water to tread. I sigh, and try to clear my mind. I need to be shooting on all my pistons tonight.

I arrive at our usual restaurant quarter to eight. The reservation has already been made. I look regal, and the heads turn. I have my black dress, low cut in the front, and lacy. I have a lace covering my face. Black pumps, and black nail polish. Light make-up. I’m a panther tonight. I aim to take no prisoners. Let’s see how this little amateur sub can match up to me!  

Always the punctual Christian, is four minutes late to our dinner date! He’s never late. But I try not to dwell on it. ‘Pick your battles Elena!’ I tell myself. As he arrives in his gorgeous, I-own-the-world demeanor, I get up to greet him. I smile warmly at my former sub, and Dom and my friend.  (←Corrupt by Depeche Mode)

“Hello Christian!” I say softly to greet him with a friendly smile on my face.

“Hi Elena,” he respond back to me with a warm smile reciprocating mine. I lean in to kiss him on the cheeks and he leans his face in to meet my lips half way as my hands connect with his upper arms. I release him and we both sit down at the same time. The waiter rushes to the table, and asks what we would like to drink. Christian, always the wine expert orders Châteauneuf-du-Pape White 2009 without even looking at the wine menu.

After the waiter scurries away, I scrutinize Christian with an assessing gaze. Anxious, a little on the edge, nervous, and something else I can’t put my finger on. I try to observe it all nonchalantly.

“You seem a little on edge today Christian. Is everything alright?”

“Yes,” he answers me a little too brusquely.

“Alright,” I say with a smile playing on my lips. “I assumed you would want to talk about her,” I say significantly since he’s not going to bring the topic up. “I’ve never seen you this on edge...” I say, then correct myself. I have seen him on edge before. When he was a teenager. That’s not good! “Well, not in so many years. What’s going on? Is it about your new sub?” I ask calmly.

“Yes,” he responds monosyllabic. My eyes scan his demeanor, his body language, his speech pattern, and I try to miss nothing. I nod my head for him to go on.

“Anastasia left town. So, I’m a little apprehensive because of it.”

“For good? I thought you two just met,” I say surprised and his response shocks us both.

“Heavens, no! I can’t handle her absence even for a day! It’s been less than twenty four hours,” he say checking his watch as if he’s counting the minutes, and having a countdown to the time she’s going to be back in town, “and I’ve been nothing but an ogre to everyone around me. She went to Georgia to see her mother,” he says. I raise my eyebrows, looking at him anew like my Christian is gone, and he’s been replaced with this gushy clone. I’m displeased! Fucking bitch! What has she done to him? I aim to find out.  

“Well... How’s sex? I take that it’s beyond your expectations if you missed her that much,” I say smiling. Sex is always an easy topic for us to talk about. After all, we’ve done just about anything under the sun together. I thought him everything he knows...well, just about everything. He’s done a great deal of learning of his own, and I’d love to find out what they are.

“It’s spectacular for one who’s so young, so innocent, so willing to learn considering she was a virgin,” he say looking at me with an impassive expression on his face. My head snaps up, and I’m so shocked that he actually found a fucking virgin, I choke on the Châteauneuf-du-Pape White 2009 I’m sipping. My reaction actually makes him smile.

“She was a virgin?” I mutter like an expletive a little too sharply making him narrow his gray eyes on me. He’s so hot, even when he’s angry! I’d love to get my hands on that tense jaw, and bite those reddening earlobes. I try to clear my mind from these thoughts, so I can focus with the matter at hand.

“Yes. Is that a problem?” he asks defensively.

“No. But I never took you for a virgin man. When did this change of taste develop? All your subs were experienced and established submissives. Given her age, I had assumed that she had less experience than the other ones, but a virgin? Christian, are you sure she can fulfill all your needs dear?” I ask softly trying to rein in my rising passion and anger all at the same time.

“No one has ever fulfilled my needs as much as she does!” he says defensively. (← She’s Always a Woman by Billy Joel)

“Come now! Given what you have just revealed, she was completely inexperienced in sex until, what three weeks ago...” I say raising my eyebrows questioning. “You know it takes years to master submissiveness. It took you years,” I say with a knowing smile. Not just years, but a lot of punishment, flogging, spanking, belting... What, a bitch who was in diapers and a binky yesterday meets him, and all of a sudden she’s the center of attention? She knows nothing of his needs. Not a single thing!

“How do you know she’ll meet all your needs?” I say in a firm whisper leaning in. “You have needs that even a very experienced submissive can’t fulfill. Dark needs...” I say, and then lean back letting the rest of her thoughts linger in the air; letting it sink in. He knows nothing about this new territory, and it will damage him. What he does know benefited him exponentially. Feelings are for losers, and I didn’t train him to be a loser! I count to ten inside, watching the waiter pour wine at the next table. I gaze at the flowers on the table. I look at the wall art. Hmm. Serenity washes over me momentarily.

Christian’s gaze darkens in rising anger. “I don’t like you speaking in those terms about Anastasia! I like her!” he says, his gaze not leaving mine. Then almost instantly his voice softens when he starts speaking about the brunette ho who is currently occupying his playroom. “A lot actually... I never know what she will do, or say which is a breath of fresh air actually. She is smart, witty, a great negotiator,” he says with the stupidest grin he ever donned on his face. Oh goody! Add the list obedient, then you have a golden retriever! What the hell has this harlot done to my protégé?

“I’ve never felt this alive - ever in my life!” he says as I’m trying to occupy myself sipping the fucking wine which I taste nothing of. Where the hell is the fucking waiter? I need something stronger! Double shot whisky or vodka. I tap my finger nervously on my lap.

“She makes me feel completely, utterly, significantly alive! I lose my reason around her, but then it’s a conundrum. She gives me a new purpose, a new reason for being,” he says, stupid idiot! Yes, let’s see how alive will feel  when the virgin cunt drains the life out of you after she rips your heart apart and tosses on the ground before you! I smile at him. I like the slap that grin off of his frigging handsome face!

“I’m intrigued Christian. If you like her that much, I’d like to meet her,” I say coolly. Let me see if that strumpet is as good as he says she is!

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he says with a flat expression. Why the hell not? Why couldn't I meet her?

“Why is that? Don’t tell me you don’t want to introduce her to your teacher,” I say and give him a pointed look.

“She doesn’t want to meet you. I think she hates you for introducing me to BDSM lifestyle when I was 15. She sees you as a child molester,” he says without expression on his face. I actually lose control for a minute and blanche, taken aback. She is competing with me! What do those amateurs say? Oh yeah... Bring it on! Except when she does, I’ll be wiping the floor with her after I give her a good flogging!

“Christian! You know it wasn’t like that!” I find myself saying defensively. And the fact that I have to defend myself because of that harlot infuriates me! “I had seen you being destructive to yourself, and quite frankly your parents were exasperated trying to deal with your fighting, school issues and this lifestyle taught you to be in charge of your own destiny. To be in control. It diverted your destructive tendencies into a different channel so you didn’t harm yourself, thought you how to focus, and be goal oriented.”

“I know. She doesn’t understand our relationship, and she is apprehensive about it. She’s entitled to her opinion,” he says. At least he hasn’t forgotten. There’s still hope for him. God! This is worse than I thought!

“But, that’s not how you feel, is it?” I ask him concerned leaning in. “You know how much your friendship means to me. I care about you immensely. You’re the only person I care as much about...” I say pausing. “More than anyone else. Your friendship is very important to me Christian, and I don’t want to lose it. Certainly not because of one of your subs,” I reiterate.

“Please don’t refer to Anastasia as ‘one of my subs.’ I care about you and your friendship means a great deal to me as well. Anastasia doesn’t understand our relationship because she doesn’t have a fucked up past like I do which I’m thankful for. I don’t think I could have handled it if she had a past,” he actually says shaking his head.

I look at him carefully eyeing him. This isn’t my Christian. He’s the same on the surface, but he’s different somehow. What has changed? What the fuck has the bitch done to him? But, since he’s here, and talking, I want to take advantage, and learn as much as I can. I find more than the anger growing in me; but what? Am I jealous of a harlot who is barely out of her teens? Can she even be a match to me?

“Her absence,” he says pausing, trying to catch his breath...oh my God! He’s too far gone! “constricts my heart, like someone is about to rip it apart. And the fact that she’s clear across the country, the thought that she might meet another suitor over there makes me beyond jealous! I can’t name this emotion. It’s completely foreign to me Elena!”  he finishes his thoughts out of breath. Fuck! What to do? What to do? What to do?

“I see... Well, if you have such strong feelings for her,” I say putting my hand over his on the table, “and that you miss her this much, why don’t you go after her? That’s the logical thing to do... Don’t you think?” I probe for more. Opposing to Christian rarely works. In the Art of War, Sun Tzu says, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.” I aim to get to know this bitch! “Fight your enemy where they’re not...” She’s not here, and I mean to take advantage of any tool available for Christian’s benefit. It’s like shooting fish in a barrel with Christian, but not when you tell him you’re shooting at him. Subtle is the keyword here, in this battle. And it’s only for his benefit. He may be hurt now, but he’ll be better off in the future. Clean cut!

“She went to Georgia,” he goes on, “because she can’t think clearly around me,” he actually sighs. “Neither can I for that matter, but, I think she needs to assess her feelings for me, and decide whether our relationship would work as it is.” he says. Idiot! I think to myself.

“Christian! I’m surprised at you! She’s your sub! She ought to do what she is asked to do, otherwise, dump her ass, and get one that obeys you properly the way a sub should,” I say firmly – he is a Dom, and he should act like one. Not like a pussy! He narrows his eyes on me. That’s not good!

“Elena, don’t give me your Dom shit! I don’t need that fuck, and I know it better than you do how a Sub should be!” He says through gritted teeth, and his words and demeanor makes me slightly flinch back, but I regain control. “But, I want to give her the space she asked for, wants, and needs. But today, as we were e-mailing back and forth, she said that she wished I was there. I think she misses me as much as I miss her. I want this to work between us... Badly. She’s not just any sub. She’s important to me...”

I gaze at him for a long minute and say, “You have your answer then; if she said she wishes you were there, she wants you to come.” If the bitch doesn’t want him to come, there could be two reasons. 1. Either she’s really worried and scared of his Dominance, which makes my work easy, then him showing up in Georgia would scare the crap out of her, and she might end it. 2. She has some other fucker lined up, and currently fucking him, or better yet her, and that may explain why she was still a virgin, and if that’s the case Christian better find out. Being the dominant he is, and being the monogamy freak he is, he may break off with her. In either case, it’s a win-win situation.

“I don’t want to screw this up Elena! I don’t want to scare her away. I don’t think I can handle of not being with her,” he states with grief laden voice.

My mouth drops open, my eyes go wide. Oh, I hope to God, I’m not too late to save him from destruction!

“Christian Grey! I can’t believe it! Are you in love with her?” I blurt out.

He looks at me shocked, and I see his eyes going wild with fear which actually worries me. Oh no! I do care about Christian! I don’t want to see him broken. I’ve seen him broken before, and the memory of it comes unbidden. My eyes soften with the boy before me. “No! No! Definitely not! I don’t do love! I don’t deserve her love... I... I can’t love. You said it before – it’s a useless emotion.” He shakes his head. “No, I can’t... I mean, I don’t think I’m in love,” he says; I don’t know whether he’s trying to convince himself, or me. I’m truly worried about him. Maybe I’ll wait till he sorts everything out. This is not good!

“Hmm...” I murmur without leaving my gaze away from Christian, “let me restate that phrase Christian. You are in love with her!” I say with unequivocally conviction of this sad truth.  

He looks at me bewildered. My poor boy! “I can’t be in love Elena! I’m no good for her!” he says with fear in his voice.

“Christian! You’re always so harsh on yourself with so much self-deprecation! You have to stop that dear! She should hope that she’s good enough for you! You’re a good catch Christian...” I say chiding him. “You’re handsome, rich, and talented in many venues that women are interested in. You’re one of a kind! Where would she find someone like you? Whereas you can wave your hand and find hundreds of Anastasias who would in fact run to do your bidding. You can have your pick of women... It is she who is lucky to have your regard dear,” I finish my sentence. He’s beating himself up over this woman, and I’m worried that he’s going to get hurt. But instead, Christian gets angry with me!

“Elena! I don’t ever want you to speak of Anastasia as if she something dime a dozen! She’s none of those things! I have the highest regard for her, and she’s one among millions. In the course of my entire life, I have not met anyone like her! Not one single person! It’s true that I lose my reason around her, but then...” he pauses and adds, “then, I also find a renewed purpose with her presence. She’s so precious to me. I have this immense desire to protect and care for her. I have feelings which I cannot name, and it scares the life out of me! But, the thought of losing her is the worst fear I’ve ever had in my life! I can’t even handle it in the hypothetical.  It’s too scary... My affection for her is soul deep.” If this isn’t a confession of love, I don’t know what is!

“You really are in love with her Christian! I know you better than anyone...” I say but he cuts me off.

“Not anyone! Anastasia knows me better!” he corrects me. I finally narrow my eyes on him and as a nervous gesture, I tuck my hair expertly cut by Franco only this afternoon with my finely manicured index finger behind my ear.

“Better than me?” I ask incredulous without realizing I’m letting him compare me to an amateur who didn’t even know what a penis looked like four weeks ago!

“You know I’m very private,” he says to me with an impassive expression.

“And I’ve known you intimately since you were fifteen, Christian!” I enunciate, without being able to rein in my rising anger, I try to correct Christian.

“No Elena!” he corrects me. “No Elena! You and I were as intimate as a car collison,” he says adding, “You and I started fucking when I was fifteen and it lasted until I was twenty one. But that was the extent of it. You and I can talk about just about anything, but she’s the one person I ever allowed to know me intimately. To love me, to make love to me. You and I never made love. We just fucked!” he glares at me.

“That was the best fucking...” I simply state. “Can Anastasia come up to par with our fucking?” I ask him bluntly. He grins a proud smile at me in the affirmative.

“She’s better than all the women I fucked combined,” he says with that idiot’s grin I like to wipe off!

“Ouch!” I say smiling. “That’s harsh.”

“You asked for it. I state it as I see it, Elena.”

“Well, since you have such a high regard for her Christian, and that you’re in love with her,” I say and he opens his mouth to protest again; I don’t know for what reason quite frankly after confessing what he feels... The point is moot. I hold my hand up to say what goes through my heart.

“Look, you’d be the last to know, but I can see that you are in love with her. If you have even a prayer of having your relationship in the context you want working, you have to go to her. Fly out there! See your woman if you’re missing her so much. Apparently she told you she’s missing you, too. If she feels the same for you, she wouldn’t be bothered seeing you. Unless, of course she has someone or something else other than the motive she stated. Go to her. Get to your woman Christian!” I say. Let the chips fall where they may.  I see the change in his face.

“I want to give her the space she needs, so she can think clearly. But, I do wish to see her,” he says, but there is longing in his voice. This may not be a lost battle just yet.

“Oh, baby, I can see the longing in your eyes for her. She might in fact be freaked out, but how will you find out what she’s up to,” I say, and unable to help but murmur to myself, “or whom she’s on top of,” he looks at me trying to decipher what I said, but I give nothing away. He shakes his head as I slightly raise my eyebrows and sip away my wine. Damn waiter better bring me something harder right now!

To my relief, Christian’s face takes a look of determination. Then his Blackberry must have buzzed, but I heard nothing, and he takes it out and looks at it with the same stupid grin. Yep! It’s the bitch that’s texting. She has a long leash, all the way from Georgia! She yanks, he barks!

Christian tucks his phone safely into his jacket’s pocket.

“What is it?” I ask him trying to look disinterested.

“Nothing,” he says smiling. Nothing, my rosy pink ass!

“Do you know what Anastasia calls you?” he asks. Of course! The bitch, child molester, Dominator... the list is endless.

“No,” I say with a little apprehension lacing my voice. “Nothing bad or undeserving I hope,” I say politely in polite company.

“No. Nothing of the sorts. Your nickname is ‘Mrs. Robinson’, “ he says. Oh, how classic! The famous cougar!

I smile at him for his benefit. “Mrs. Robinson,” I say trying the name out. “She must be really special for you Christian. Because she’s the only one you’ve talked about me, or what we’ve had before among any of your subs. Though, obviously subs come and go...” I say my sentence hanging in the air between us.

“Yes, subs may come and go, but Anastasia stays!” he replies firmly. His response gives me a sad smile. I may have lost him already.

“Go to her,” I say taking a large gulp of my wine.

“I intend to,” he says. “She’s mine!” I look at him with that sentence. Two simple words, yet so powerful. He’s never said that about anyone. Not even me... Mine... What a powerful word. I’d like him to be mine.

“Indeed. If she’s trying to reassess her feelings as you say she is doing, she might get scared and run away. But, if she desires you as much as you desire her, she might be happy to see you as well. You would never know until you try, Christian,” I say.  I want to say more. I'm too worried about him that she’ll hurt him, break him beyond repair. But, he’s a grown man, and he’s not my sub. This battle I will wait to fight... after he gets back from Georgia.

Bring it on little gold digger... Let’s see who the mightier fighter is!

Christian and I part ways around 9:30, and sadly he doesn’t notice me beyond the surface. Hell! Not even on the surface. Every male in the restaurant gaze and ogle me either in secret, or openly, but not Christian as we make our way out of the place. He’s been here, but his mind was in Georgia with a woman who is not worthy of him. Have I already lost him? I think not. Elena Lincoln doesn’t lose! (← Right Here Waiting For You by Richard Marx)

Hi everyone! This is Elena's side of the story. What do you think about Charlize Theron? She's beautiful, talented, and she can pull this role off easily. Other suggestions?